Forced To Marry
by Rebecca Fairchild
Summary: Jace didn't go to Valentine when his parents died-straight to the Lightwoods. Jocelyn is still madly in love with Valentine and never left. Clary is being forced to marry Sebastian-an abusive family friend who is "in love" with Clary. Will the Golden boy save her?
1. Chapter 1

Hi readers! I am super exited because this is my first story-I have been obsessed with The Mortal Instruments for a long time-I am finding my way around this. I will try to review once or twice a week. I hope you like it. And remember reviews are always appreciated! Here is the plot. Thx Rebecca _ Jace's parents died when he was born so he went to live with the Lightwoods. Meanwhile, Jocelyn never left Valentine and Valentine is forcing Clary to get married to Sebastian who is abusive and "loves" her. 


	2. Fiancé? What?

Chapter 1... I looked up from my drawing as my brother walked in. "Family conference. Fathers office" he said in a monotone voice and walked out. I sighed closing my sketchbook and walking over to my closet trying to find a not so sexy dress. My father says that I have to wear them to important events even though all he buys me are the short, revealing ones. As I walked down to his office I was wondering what happened since we didn't have family conferences often. Was mother hurt? Did the Clave find us? Well I wouldn't really mind the latter. I never did agree with any of my fathers choices. Finally I reached my fathers office. I walked in only to find my mother, father, brother, and Sebastian. Sebastian is my fathers second in commands son. And the biggest asshat ever. "Clarissa" my father started smoothly "what took you so long in getting to this family conference?" My anger bubbled over. "Well I would have been here sooner but I since I'm required to put on these damn dresses..." I let the sentence trail off. "And anyway what is this asshat doing here!" I exclaimed angrily "I thought this was a family conference" putting emphasis on family. Wow. I feel a lot better. "Clarissa" Valentine started angrily "you will not speak to your fiancé like that, apologize right now!" His face was turning red but I don't care. Fiancé? What? "What do you mean fiancé" I stated in a deadly whisper. My mother finally decided to join the conversation "it means your getting married!" She said in a cheerful tone. My father-who was still angry-said "I never heard an apology Clarissa" "I'm not apologizing" I stated plopping on the couch. There was no way in hell I would be apologizing to that thing. "Clarissa apologize now." "Nope" I said popping the p knowing it annoys him. I was examining my fingernails pretending to not be interested. "And by the way" I added knowing that this is suicidal "I am not going to marry that" I said with a pointed glare at my "fiancé". I glanced at my father and saw that he was redder then a tomato. He stormed over to me, grabbed me by my hair roughly and told Sebastian to come. He was dragging me by my hair and all I can say is that it hurt. A lot. I looked back to find Sebastian smiling at me. Stupid asshat. Father dragged me to the training room. I cringed inside knowing that I was about to get whipped. He put me in metal cuffs facing him. Damn it I thought the front always hurts more. Valentine tore off my clothes leaving me in my strapless, silk, black bra and underwear. Sebastian was looking at me with lust and desire. Like that's ever going to happen. "This is your last chance to apologize" Valentine explained to me. I just tilted my head up in defiance. I heard a swish in the air and then a crack. The worst part was the pain no, not pain, agony. After every five lashes he would ask me to apologize. Finally, after 25 I broke screaming "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry for calling you asshat a-and that!" Valentine stopped and smirked at me saying "the wedding will be I a week, in the meantime Sebastian will be staying here." Then he turned on his heel and left, leaving me alone with him. And to make matters worse, from all the lashings my bra fell off leaving me in only my underwear. _ So that's the first chapter! I was so happy to notice that I already had 4 positive reviews. Keep them comin! And if you have any ideas on the story I read my comments every day. I will probably review more with shorter chapters-just sayin! Thxxxxx Rebecca 


	3. Chapter 4

A few hours-and healing runes-later I was sitting in my room sketching wearing only a big loose shirt and underwear-no bra. Suddenly my door opened and a Maid came in saying "required family dinner now." I sighed about to get up when a thought struck me. I'm getting married in a week. That means only one more week of freedom. So why should I attend a dinner with people I don't even like? Instead of getting up I told the Maid "I will eat in my room." She gave a small nod"What should I tell Valentine?" She asked fearfully. I pondered over this for a second. He will see right through any lies, so I might as well not beat around the bush. "Tell him to fuck off" I replied firmly. Once she scurried out of the room I resumed drawing. "She told me what?!" I heard Valentine scream a few minutes later. I smiled smugly until I heard the heavy footsteps come up the stairs. Suddenly my door swung open violently and Valentine stormed in. "Clarissa" he said through clenched teeth "put on a dress and come eat dinner with us." "No thanks." I told him cheerfully with a smile. Instead of answering Valentine strode over to me and put me over his shoulder, carrying me to my closet. There he plucked out the sluttiest dress I have, ripped off my shirt, and slid on the dress. It didn't even cover my whole butt, dropped to right above my nipples and since I wasn't wearing a bra... No way in hell was I going down there in this! I started squirming and wriggling around to escape. Not a lot of good that did, Valentine still had no trouble carrying me. Once we entered the dining room Valentine dropped me on the seat next to Sebastian. I glared at Valentine while he smirked. I looked down at my food-Chicken Alfredo. I was about to pick up my fork when a new thought entered my head. Instead of eating I crossed my arms across my chest. Sebastian cleared his throat and told me out loud "Clarissa, you look beautiful. Those types of dresses bring out your inner beauty." I rolled my eyes. Of course he likes this dress-I look like a hooker. My mother was droning on about something until Valentine interrupted her "Aren't you going to eat Clarissa? Your food will be getting cold." "I told the Maid that I would eat in my room and I am sticking to that statement" I informed Valentine. Before Valentine could open his mouth Sebastian said "Mr. Morgenstern, please let me handle this. After all soon I will have to deal with these types of situations." After a moments thought Valentine replied"Of course." I refused to look at him so I stared at the wall in front of me. All of a sudden Sebastian was carrying my bridal style over to his chair until he sat down. He was facing straight with me sitting sideways on his lap. Damn idiot. All of a sudden Sebastian's hand slipped in my underwear so suddenly I let out a gasp. While my mouth was open, Sebastian shoved food in my mouth then quickly kissed long and hard. That sneaky little bastard! Finally I swallowed and he stopped kissing me. Sebastian's finger-no not finger his whole hand-was in my underwear. I felt shivers down my spine as I felt him stroke my entrance. In a split second his hand was out of my underwear and he said to my parents "she is stubborn, I'll give her that! So I will take her to her room so that she will eat if that is okay with you?" "Why of course!" My mother said "you two need some time alone anyway to get to know each other." Then I spoke up "no way am I going with...with him!" Valentine broke in saying "just carry her and her plate to her room" in a flash I was already in Sebastian's arms going up to my room screaming "no, no put me down!" I did not want to be alone in the same room as that rapist. Suddenly there was hot breath in my ear. "If you stop struggling, I will go easier on you." Well gee if you said that earlier I totally would have stopped I thought sarcastically. That, in fact made me squirm more and struggle harder. I heard Sebastian sigh and mutter a finally once we reached my room. He locked the door and dropped the plate of food on the table and put his other arm around me. He forced me onto the bed and took his belt off. Then he wrapped his belt around my wrists and around a bar on my headboard leaving me on my back with my hands trapped above my head. Sebastian stepped back admiring his work-or me I couldn't really tell-but either way it creeped me out. Then he jumped on me with his legs next to the sides of my thighs. "I told you to not struggle bitch" he said slapping me. Then he slowly pulled the dress down, being careful about not ripping it. Of course he wants me to wear the sexiest dress I own again! Idiot. When the dress was finally off, Sebastian pounced on me. First he grabbed both my boobs in both his hands while sliding his body up against mine while not letting go of my boobs. He whispered "see their a perfect fit" in my ear while squeezing my boobs to show me what he meant. Then he started kissing the sensitive spot on my neck then nibbling on it before continuing his way down. Once he reached my breasts he started giving me wet sloppy kisses down the middle of my boobs. While he was kissing me, his hands were rubbing my hardened nipples, digging his fingernails into them. After that he started sucking on my right boob while his right hand lightly skimmed over my stomach, into my underwear. Instead of skimming my entrance like he usually does he used three fingers to push the middle part of my underwear down just far enough so that I was naked in front of him. I started struggling against the belt, trying to get my hands free. Then I remembered that my feet weren't tied down so I brought up my knee and hit it to his crotch hard. Instead of moaning in pain and rolling off me like I thought he would he just smiled with my boob between his teeth. Oh by the Angel what did i just do? He spit out my boob and brought his right hand back up to the boob that he sucked on, feeling the softened nipple. Then his mouth worked its way down to my crotch. He started kissing right over my entrance and suddenly, he thrust his tongue inside me. He was watching me. It felt weird and, even though I didn't want to, I squirmed around. Eventually, squirming wasn't enough so I started to buck my hips forward and back. I groaned out loud without meaning to. Sebastian was still watching me intently. Then he pulled out of me, and started to untie my hands. Out loud he told me "your father and I agreed it would be better if we moved the wedding date. We will be getting married the day after tomorrow. Then we will be moving into the house that night." While I was trying to comprehend the words he just said, Sebastian put his belt back on, grabbed the plate of food, emptied it in the garbage, and left. While I was putting on pants his words finally hit me like a bag of bricks. I was getting married the day after tomorrow. What little time of freedom I had left disappeared. I slipped on a shirt and climbed under the covers of my bed. I only had one more day of freedom and I knew exactly how I wanted to spent it. _ Sorry about not updating but I had to study for a test. So to make up for it I made a long chapter! I want more reviews! I only got 2 last chapter and I know at least 7 people are reading this. I'm thinking that the next chapter will be the next day/marriage/see the house. Thoughts? Old Q/A answer: My fav quote is Jace: unfortunately my one true love remains myself. Clary: at least you don't have to worry about rejection Jace: I turn myself down on occasion just to keep things interesting. New Q/A: Who is your favorite couple inTMI? Thxxxx Rebecca 


	4. Chapter 3

The next morning I woke up at 4 am-so I wouldn't run into Sebastian-and put on a sports bra, baggy t-shirt, underwear, and yoga pants. Then I put my hair into a messy bun and glided into the kitchen. I went into dads liquor cabinet and grabbed all of it-which was a lot. If I had one day until I got married to an asshat the last thing I wouldn't want is to remember sulking around-which I would do even if I didn't want to-so I won't remember it at all. I downed a beer making a face at the taste and moved to wine. I picked a random one and drank it slowly, savoring the taste. I stared to feel funny. I started laughing randomly. I snatched another bottle of wine-I couldn't tell which because the words were starting to blur together. I was giggling and half skipping, half stumbling down the hall...the rest of the day was a blur. ================================ The Next Day: I woke up to my mom shaking me with a huge smile on her face. I have a pounding headache, what did I do yesterday? I can't remember ANYTHING! "What did I do yesterday?" My mother eyed me disapprovingly. "You were so drunk we had to knock you out so you wouldn't fall down the stairs or off the balcony" then she brightened up "after all, we couldn't have our little girl bruised up on her wedding day!" Oh crap, I totally forgot it was my wedding day! Ugh today I am moving in with him. My mom told me my schedule. "You have to be in your room by 4, I will get you ready until the wedding which is at 7. Then the wedding will end up at 8:30, finally you will go to the new house at around 8:45." I sighed, "alright be here by 4, got it." "Also, Sebastian is at his house to get ready" mother said. Oh thank god. At least I have a few hours of peace before moving in with that monster. "Now, don't get drunk or you will be in a lot of trouble" mother informed me strictly. "Ok ok gosh you get drunk one time..." I trailed off. Mother walked out with a bounce in her step. I was never allowed to sleep in, even as a child I had to wake up at 6, so I decided to sleep in until 3:30. So I set up the alarm and fell asleep. Beep beep beep. I woke up feeling groggy. I rolled over smacking the snooze button. Then my stomach growled loudly. At least I didn't have a headache anymore. I got out of bed and stumbled to the kitchen. My brother was already in there. "There's our little princess! Nice hair" he said sarcastically. "Ugh I have to go up in my room at 4 to get ready for 3 hours. What takes so long to get ready?" "Oh I don't know, maybe the dress that will 'bring out your inner beauty'" Jonathan replied with a smirk. "Oh no no no no please tell me that mom didn't buy me one of those hooker dresses!" I begged him. "On the contrary actually" I relaxed "she bought you a whole new wardrobe full of those 'hooker dresses'" I started munching on the cereal I got out. "Great just wonderful" I replied sarcastically. I looked at the clock on the wall and it read 4. I groaned. "See you later" I told him "I gotta go through 3 hours of torture." I heard him chuckle quietly when I turned around. "Can it Jonathan" which only made his chuckling increase. Boys I thought while exiting the kitchen. I reached my bedroom at 4:10 since I was walking slowly. My mother was inside pacing. I walked in, dramatically saying "I'm here!" "Oh thank the angel!" Mother said in relief "what took you so long?" "I lost track of time" I told her truthfully. She eyed me suspiciously and said "alright well let's get you ready, we have no time to spare." I sat down while she did my makeup and hair, not talking while she did so. Once she was done she strapped back and handed me a mirror. I had on sparkly, black eyeliner, some blush, and my hair was straightened in a bun with pieces down in the front. "Alright time to get you in your dress, Sebastian picked it out himself claiming that he didn't want me to go through all that stress, what a sweet boy." She told me with a hint of a smile on her face. I sighed knowing that it will be a hooker dress. When my mother brought out the dress I couldn't tell how bad it was until I put it on. Before I put it on mother made me put it on she made me put on a strapless black bra and a black thong. Once I put it on I could tell how bad it really was. It was pure gold, clung to me, and stopped right under my butt. It was strapless and had a v neck. It had holes in the side that went almost as high as my bra and almost as low as my thong. My mother handed me a pair of gold flats. "Follow me" mother said and led me downstairs to the ballroom doors. There was music coming from inside and lace curtains covering the glass doors. My father was waiting for me. "I am so proud of you. You are going to be married to a wonderful guy, live a happy life, and lead The Circle when we are gone. I will see you after the wedding." My mother said before she slipped into the door. Lead The Circle? No one told me that. My father grabbed my arm before I could say anything and opened the door revealing everyone in The Circle. And worst of all, Sebastian. I am not ready for this. I am so not ready for this. _ Ok REVIEW! Now that I figured out fanfic I will be posting more regularly. Also REVIEW Thxxx Rebecca 


	5. Chapter 5

Oh Angel Raziel, I thought, hasn't this been a bad enough day already. And now my bra falls off! Sebastian is walking over to me with a look of pure lust on his face. Once he reached me, he put his mouth right next to my ear and seductively said "so beautiful and your almost mine." I shivered inwardly at the thought. "I am not some sort of toy-" I told him before I got cut off. His lips were on mine, he was kissing me! I gasped against his mouth, shocked. "Oh but you are" Sebastian said firmly against my lips "until death do us part you will belong to me." I felt repulsed by what he just said. In fact, I almost threw up. Sebastian attacked my lips with his and he roughly grabbed my left breast, squeezing it with his hand. Ow I thought I ow, ow, and OW! He was being too rough, it hurt. His hand left my boob only to wander to my butt! Does me ever take a break? He smacked my butt before squeezing my left butt cheek hard. I started struggling to get away from him but found it impossible considering that my hands and feet were still trapped. His lips left my lips only to travel to my neck, only pausing to give me a hickey, and continued farther south to my breasts. There he started sucking and biting on my right breast while rubbing my left nipple. I was still squirming, trying to get away from him even though a part of me knew it was useless. His right hand slipped into my underwear, ghosting at my entrance. I closed my eyes, started involuntarily shaking and desperately tried to get out of the hand cuffs. Suddenly he stopped so I opened my eyes only to find that he was unlocking my feet cuffs. When he unlocked those, I didn't have the energy to hold myself up so I just hung there like a rag doll. As soon as he unlocked the hand cuffs I fell to the floor. Cursing at myself I tried to get up only to be pushed back down, rolled over, and sat on. I looked up to find Sebastian, with his legs on the sides of my waist, crushing me and leaning down. I shut my eyes closed tight. This isn't happening, this isn't happening, this isn't happening I kept repeating over and over in my mind. Sebastian's voice broke me out of thought. "A house is being built a couple streets over, we will live their after the wedding. And don't worry, I won't take you until after the wedding" All the pressure was gone in a flash. Slowly I opened my eyes, scared at what I might find. I let out a huge breath. The room was empty. "I swear..." I whispered "I swear to the Angel Raziel that I will try to find a way to escape." _ Thanks for the reviews but I only got 2! I want to get more. If you have any questions on the story just ask! Since I want more reviews I am going to think of a question about the mortal instruments every chapter and I will tell you my answer in the next chapter, here is this one... What is your favorite quote from the mortal instruments? Roseeton:I will write short chapters because it keeps the inspiration flowing for me but I will try to update every day if not every other day. 


	6. AN

Hi guys, Thanks for all the updates and I am sorry about the chapter mix up. My phone has been acting crazy. I will do the format differently from now on. Thanks for the reviews


	7. Chapter 7

I woke up to the sound of water running. I opened my eyes slowly only to find that I am uncuffed yet still naked and on top of the sheets. I quickly jumped up and grabbed a sheet, wrapping it around me. I must have made some noise because when I looked back at Sebastian he was watching me.

He started walking towards me and was saying "you know you have nothing to hide I have seen it all before" he reached me and whispered in my ear "in fact I prefer you without anything on."

With the last word he said he pulled the sheet off. I reached for the sheet back but winced at the soreness between my legs. "Oh where are my manners" Sebastian began "you are probably a little sore, here let me run you a hot bath." I just stared at him in a your-really-going-to-do-that look.

He just turned on his heel and waited for the tub to fill up-which, surprisingly, didn't take long. He motioned me over with a wave of his hand, but I just stood there probably looking like an idiot. He just sighed and walked over to me and carried me bridal style to the tub and placed me in.

It actually felt really good, amazing even, and I started to relax until Sebastian took his shirt off. "What are you doing?" I asked him. "Taking a bath" he replied simply. "I hope your not doing it with me because there is no room" I lied. He knew I was lying to, the bathtub was huge! In response he just pulled his pants down and in a fluid moment slipped in the tub. I sighed and closed my eyes, trying to relax.

I found out it is hard to relax when you are with someone that just raped you. I spread my legs open a little more, trying to get more warm water between my legs in order to help them become a little less sore. Suddenly, without any warning, there was something inside me. I snapped my eyes open and saw Sebastian pumping his finger in and out of me in a rhythmic motion. "You know" I started hoping that this would get him to stop "this bath was meant for me to become a little less sore, not more sore." He pulled his finger out of me and I celebrated a little victory until he told me "you may think this bath was for you when in reality it was for me, everything from now on will be for me!" With the last word he shoved his dick inside me causing me to yelp out.

Luckily for me it wasn't as painful as last time. Unluckily for me, this time Sebastian was telling me what to do. "Wrap you legs around my waist" he started, I did as he asked knowing that the consequences would be severe if I refused "put your hands in my hair and moan every once in a while." With that said he thrust so far into me I let out a scream. I will not moan, he may make me scream but I won't stoop so low as to moan.

Our bodies were slippery against each other's. He hand grasped my slippery boob, feeling the softened nipple and everything around it. With a jerky movement, he pulled out if me and ran soft, sloppy kisses down my abs. His hands went under my butt lifting it, leaving me in a position where I was floating except my knees were bent so the bottom of my feet were on the tub floor. He stuck his tongue out a little right above my underwear tan line and trailed his mouth, and tongue, to my entrance where he wasted no time in jamming his tongue inside me. Sebastian kept a firm grip on my butt and hands, and wrapped his legs tightly around my legs. He rubbed his tongue on my G spot causing me to go into orgasm.

Waves of pleasure rolled within my body and I moaned out loud without meaning to. I felt Sebastian smirk against my pussy. I hate myself. Why did I do that? I'm an idiot. Sebastian pulled his tongue out of me and went straight to my neck where he sucked my neck, and then bit it leaving a hickey. "Tell me that you belong to me" he ordered me. "People can't be owned..." I started until he interrupted me "tell me that you belong to me." "No" I shot back.

With an aggravated sigh he slipped out of the tub. I tried to get out but he pushed me back into the water. What is he doing? He told me "get out of the water" I did as he asked, knowing I already aggravated him. I barely got out of the tub before Sebastian carried me with my chin on his shoulder and one hand around my back and his other hand on my butt. I quickly wrapped my legs around his waist. He pulled his hand off my butt and aimed his dick into me. He lowered me down a little so he could be inside me and carry me all at once.

I have a gasp of surprise. He was carrying me through the house-I don't really know where though since he didn't show me the tour. After a few minutes if walking, Sebastian opened a door and walked in. There were cuffs on one wall and an assortment of weapons on two other walls. Sebastian pulled out of me and carried me over to the cuffs where he locked me in them. Then he walked over to the knives and grabbed the worst one-it had a demon blade. Once Sebastian reached me he grabbed my left boob and carved a s in it. Then he grabbed my left boob and carved a c in it. It hurt like hell. "My initials so you never forget that you will always belong to me and only me!" He hissed.

But I am Clarissa Morgenstern. I do not show pain. Well I do not show pain if someone doesn't squeeze my boob. He started licking all the blood trickling down my breasts while looking at me. My face twisted in pain when he grabbed my boob and his fingers went right over my cut. "Hope your not too sore for tonight." He said with a wink leaving me chained up.

A/N Hey guys! I won't be able to update this weekend because of a soccer tournament-there is no service at the hotel-but I will keep writing and hopefully by Monday I will have 2 chapters to post. Don't forget to REVIEW! Thxxxxxx Rebecca


	8. Chapter 8

My stomach is grumbling. I am hungry. Not really starving because Valentine starved me all the time so I am pretty much used to it. The time went by slowly. I mean like turtle slow. There was nothing to do. At least Valentine kept me locked up in my room with my art supplies.

I counted all the weapons (216), made an estimated guess for what the weapons are named, and was halfway through counting the bricks on the wall-yes that's how bored I was-when Sebastian came in. He sauntered through the door with a plate filled with food and a glass filled with water-I think. He put them down on the counter and came over to unlock me out of the hand cuffs. "You hungry?" He asked. "Not at all" I lied a moment before my stomach growled.

Sebastian shot his signature smirk and sat down while patting his lap, signaling that he wanted me to sit there. I shook my head and stubbornly sat on the floor. I heard him growl and walk over to pick me up. He grabbed my hair and dragged me over to the chair, pulling me onto his lap once he sat down. He shoved food into my mouth quickly.

Once most of the food was gone Sebastian turned me around so I was facing him with my legs around his. "Why don't we take this to our new bedroom" he whispered in my ear. "Why a new bedroom?" I asked Sebastian. "Because our new one needed some...rearrangements" he informed me. He guided me forcefully down the hall, made a couple turns-I couldn't keep count-and stopped in front of double doors.

Once he opened the door I didn't have time to look around because threw me over his shoulder and carried me to the bed. He laid my naked body on top of the covers and handcuffed-these were a lot more stiff and uncomfortable then the others-me leaving me in a literal split and my arms stretched out so far I felt like rubber. He yanked off his pants and under where in a fluid motion. And quickly entered me. That's how the rest of my night went.

This time I woke up I was uncuffed and had clothes on-thankfully. I felt nauseated. I rolled over Sebastian and sprinted to the bathroom. I barely made it to the toilet before I threw up. Sebastian stumbled in and "what was that about?" I just continued puking, wondering if Sebastian did anything to my food.

I finally stopped and looked at Sebastian. I was hungry. Like literally starved which is unusual for me. "I'm hungry, let's go eat" I told Sebastian. He eyed me curiously and slowly said "ok, let's go." He led me down the stairs carefully. What was going on? He wasn't being rough anymore. Only gentle, not exactly kind-I wouldn't go that far-but more like restraining himself. Yes that's it, restraining himself!

We reached the kitchen and Sebastian made sure I was seated in a chair before cooking me breakfast. He made about 20 pancakes, which I found very offensive because I am not that fat! Usually I only eat 5 pancakes but today I ate 13! All the while Sebastian was watching me. When I finished Sebastian said 2 words that I never would have seen coming. "Your pregnant!"

Betcha never saw that comin huh! I had it ALL in my mind before. And yes Jace will be coming in. I already have it all laid out in my head, just need to type the details.

REVIEW

Thxxxxx Rebecca


	9. Chapter 9

A thousand thoughts flew into my head at once. Pregnant? No I can't be. Can I? He is a liar! But it would explain so much. I AM NOT PREGNANT, SEBASTIAN IS A LIAR!

"I am not pregnant" I told him firmly. "Yes you are he said calmly. "No I am not!" I shot back. "Fine you don't believe me, I will go visit your father this afternoon and see if he can set us up with anyone." "Ok do it, but you won't like the results!" I informed him.

"You know what, let's make this a little more fun! We can make a bet. If I win you can do whatever I want for 3 days and if you win can do whatever you want for 3 days, deal?" I thought for a moment. Wouldn't I know if I were pregnant? "Deal" I said. "Just to prove I am confident that I am right I will leave right now." Sebastian told me. "You go ahead and do that" I shot back.

He stormed out if the room and I waited until I heard him slamming the door signaling that he was leaving. I have to get rid of the baby. I might not be pregnant but just in case...I cannot lose this bet. If I lose the bet then I have to do whatever Sebastian wants. I started looking around for a bedroom. A half hour later I found one. I rushed over to all the doors wondering which is the closet. I opened the first door. Bathroom. It was the second door I opened. I grabbed an empty hanger and straightened the hook. Then I lowered my underwear and pushed the hook inside me.

I tried to keep in the scream, but I couldn't the pain was to much! I heard a thumping on the stairs. It was getting closer. Is it Sebastian? No it can't be. The door swung open. It was worse, Sebastian and Valentine stormed in. Valentine held me down carefully while Sebastian yanked the hanger out of me. "It wasn't deep enough to cause harm" he told my father. "You little bitch!" Valentine screamed. Sebastian looked at Valentine "we might want to put her in handcuffs in order to protect the baby." "Yes that would work, Sebastian" Valentine started "you bring her to the room and I will bring the warlock."

I was screaming and thrashing around, trying to escape and hurt the baby. Sebastian carried me tightly to the room where he carved his initials into my breasts. He made me sit down, handcuffed my hands on the wall handcuffs, and tied my feet together. I struggled until the most ridiculous person walked in the room. He looked about my age but everything about him was...not me. I wear black he wears sparkles. His black hair was held up into sparkly spikes. "Hi. I'm Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn." He introduced himself. I just stared at him.

"Not an overly happy patient huh" he chuckled "well down to business, I need everyone out of this room except for the patient and me" Valentine and Sebastian started to argue "because it could cause harm to the baby." Magnus yelled over them. They instantly shut up ad walked out the door. Magnus turned to me, sympathy in his eyes. He snapped his fingers and my all my clothes disappeared. "What the hell!" I screeched trying to move in order to cover myself. "It spoke!" He said before bursting into laughter. Once he calmed down he told me "don't worry, it's all part of the procedure." He examined me his eyes reading the initials carved on me.

The sympathy returned and he mumbled some words a house entered my mind, along with an address. "If you ever escape" Magnus said "you know where to go." My eyes watered with this kindness. "Thank you" I whispered.

He resumed his procedure and in a short while he was finished. "You are indeed pregnant, congratulations, I should probably tell the others." No, no, no, no. There must be some mistake. I can't be pregnant! By the angel, I lost the bet! Magnus snapped his fingers again and I was wearing some yoga pants and a T-shirt. HALF HOUR LATER Valentine left and I was alone with Sebastian. "Look who lost the bet!" He said gleefully.

"Now this is what I want. I want you just be like a rag doll except for in sex. There you will participate." I don't think that I can do that. I mean it's like a natural instinct to fight people who rape me. I just nodded. He unlocked me from the handcuffs and cut the rope off my feet. Then he ripped the clothes off of me and took all of his clothes off. He jammed his tongue inside me making me wriggle and squirm. I hate it when he does that! He stayed like that for a while. When he finally came out he didn't waste a second until he was pumping a few fingers in and out of me. I really hate this! Why this out of everything why this? An involuntary moan came out of me. I hate myself! His mouth traveled up to my boob where he sucked on it, rolling the hardened nipple between his teeth. He pulled his fingers out of me and his dick teased my entrance for only a moment before entering me.

His hand squeezed my boob. And that's how the rest of my night went.

MORNING I woke up feeling super tired. Sebastian was still asleep and inside me. I was sick. I needed to throw up. I pushed Sebastian off, and out, of me. I ran to the corner of the room and threw up. Once I was done I was starving. "Want to eat?" I asked Sebastian weakly. "I'm not that hungry, thanks for asking" he replied. He grabbed me by my hair and tied me down like he did for Magnus. Without a word he walks out of the room and something flashes in my mind. A rune!

I don't know what it meant but what's the worst thing that could happen? I die? It's better then this hell hole! I looked around the room. I need a stele. I saw one on the edge of the counter. Perfect! I lifted my legs and pushed them as far as I could forward. I felt it between my feet. Yes, yes, yes!

I grabbed it with my feet and brought it to my mouth with my feet. I snatched it with my mouth and drew the rune sloppily on my arm. Everything around me snapped open. Even the wire around my feet broke open. In other words it was the most powerful rune ever created.

In another flash, a different rune popped up in my mind and without realizing what I was doing I drew the rune on the wall. The wall opened up into a portal. I remembered what Magnus said "if you ever escape, you know where to go." So I envisioned the place in my mind and stepped into the portal.

_ Hey guys. I thought of ALL the reviews I got while I was writing this chapter so I decided to make it nice and long! How about this unless of some unusual circumstances the more reviews I get the longer the next chapter. Plus I know y'all have been super anxious about Jace so you will see him next chapter.

REVIEW Thxxxxxxxx Rebecca


	10. Chapter 10

I don't think that I will ever get used to the tornado like feeling of a portal. At least I got here with only a couple scratches. That's pretty good! The best part of all is that I am free. I noticed that I am right where I need to be. I am at Magnus's place. I stumbled up to the front door and rang the buzzer for the apartment. "Who is it?" I heard from the buzzer. "Clary" I replied to tired to think of a sarcastic response. "Clary Beary come on in!" I walked in and up the stairs to his apartment and before I even knocked he opened the door. "Ya that nickname is my going to work out" I told him before he could even open his mouth. "Wow! Your hair matches your personality" he chuckled. I sighed. "I need your help" I started "obviously, your hair is a total mess" Magnus interrupted. I shot him a glare,which he laughed at, before continuing "I need a spell so that I cannot be tracked and I need an abortion." He stopped laughing. Sebastian might have put something in the food like Valentine did for my brother. I can't live with another demon, I just can't. "Here sit down" he led me to a couch and strictly said "stay here" before going to the kitchen. I heard clanging and crashing for a couple minutes until he walked out with a cup of what I think is tea. He handed me the delicate cup and ordered me to drink it. "What is" I started until Magnus cut me off. "Drink. It." I meekly took a sip. It tasted wonderful so I gulped the rest it. "In the morning, for a week, your stomach will hurt a lot. That was an abortion remedy. Just relax and let me put the untraceable spell on you" Magnus instructed. I did as he said and a few minutes later he was done. He started talking "there is a spare bedroom down the hall" I interrupted him. "Magnus, I'm not staying here. You did so much for me already, I...I just can't. Thank you." I walked out the front door and let my feet lead the way. What will I do? I probably should have asked Magnus what state I am in. My feet stopped in front of what looked like a club. I looked at the sign. It read Pandemonium. The part that intrigued me the most was the the angelic rune on the sign. Oh what the hell. It couldn't hurt to go in there. I walked up to the bouncer and he let me in after a boy with shocking blue eyes. I automatically knew that he was a demon and I would have killed him if I had any weapons on me, but all I had was the stele. Once I was inside, I started dancing to the music. That was until I saw some shadow hunters. I need their help. Valentine would never think that I went to the Clave. So I took a deep breath and forced my way through the crowd to the door where the shadowhunters stepped into only a moment before. 


	11. Chapter 11

I don't think that I will ever get used to the tornado like feeling of a portal. At least I got here with only a couple scratches. That's pretty good!

The best part of all is that I am free. I noticed that I am right where I need to be. I am at Magnus's place. I stumbled up to the front door and rang the buzzer for the apartment.

"Who is it?" I heard from the buzzer. "Clary" I replied to tired to think of a sarcastic response. "Clary Beary come on in!"

I walked in and up the stairs to his apartment and before I even knocked he opened the door. "Ya that nickname is my going to work out" I told him before he could even open his mouth.

"Wow! Your hair matches your personality" he chuckled. I sighed. "I need your help" I started "obviously, your hair is a total mess" Magnus interrupted. I shot him a glare,which he laughed at, before continuing "I need a spell so that I cannot be tracked and I need an abortion." He stopped laughing. Sebastian might have put something in the food like Valentine did for my brother. I can't live with another demon, I just can't.

"Here sit down" he led me to a couch and strictly said "this is my boyfriend Alec, stay here, Alec I need your help" before going to the kitchen with his boyfriend. I heard clanging and crashing for a couple minutes until he walked out with a cup of what I think is tea. He handed me the delicate cup and ordered me to drink it.

"What is" I started until Magnus cut me off. "Drink. It." I meekly took a sip. It tasted wonderful so I gulped the rest it.

"In the morning, for a week, your stomach will hurt a lot. That was an abortion remedy. Just relax and let me put the untraceable spell on you" Magnus instructed. I did as he said and a few minutes later he was done.

He started talking "there is a spare bedroom down the hall" I interrupted him. "Magnus, I'm not staying here. You did so much for me already, I...I just can't. Thank you."

I walked out the front door and let my feet lead the way. What will I do? I probably should have asked Magnus what state I am in. My feet stopped in front of what looked like a club.

I looked at the sign. It read Pandemonium. The part that intrigued me the most was the the angelic rune on the sign. Oh what the hell. It couldn't hurt to go in there.

I walked up to the bouncer and he let me in after a boy with shocking blue eyes. I automatically knew that he was a demon and I would have killed him if I had any weapons on me, but all I had was the stele.

Once I was inside, I started dancing to the music. That was until I saw some shadow hunters. Alec was one out of three of those shadowhunters. Good I need their help. Valentine would never think that I went to the Clave. So I took a deep breath and forced my way through the crowd to the door where the shadowhunters stepped into only a moment before.


	12. Chapter 12

I walked in and slipped behind one of the columns. I was thinking of something to say when a gorgeous golden boy raised his knife in the air whispering its name.

Without thinking I stepped out right before golden boy was about to stab the demon. "I need help" I said clearly. Everyone in the room froze and turned to me. "Clary" Alec breathed.

"You know her?" Golden boy asked right before the demon got free and lunged on him. He was having trouble so I quickly ran over to Alec an grabbed one of his separah(AN IS THAT HOW YOU SPELL IT?) blades.

"Yo dumb ass, over here!" I yelled to the demon. He turned around and walked towards me. "Valentines daughter. There is a very big prize if we bring you back to Valentine. He never said anything about bringing you back safely" he said. Ya right that thing will bring me back to Valentine.

"You know what that prize will be? A quick death!" I told him a moment before I lunged for him. Within five seconds he was dead. I looked at golden boy and said "your welcome."

I watched him get up and put an iratze on his arm. "I know I am stunningly attractive but it isn't nice to stare" golden boy told me. I decided to come up with a sarcastic remark, so I said "I was looking at the wall because frankly it is more enjoyable to be with."

The girl and Alec began laughing so hard. "Oh Jace just...got schooled by...a 10...year old!" Alec said between his laughs. In an instant I had him pinned to the wall with the knife at his neck.

"I am 16!" I told him between clenched teeth before I let him go. "Your lucky your a friend of Magnus's or else..." I let the sentence trail off. "We are so going to be best friends!" The girl exclaimed.I turned to the other two. "Hi I'm Clarissa Morgenstern and you are?" I said.

"I'm Jace Wayland and this is my sister Isabelle Lightwood an you obviously know Alec" golden boy-well Jace told me. I was repeating his last name under my breath. His last name, it sounded familiar but I couldn't put a finger on it.

"Y-your a Morgenstern" Alec stammered. "You didn't know that? I thought you two knew each other." Isabelle asked him. "We barely know each other." I started "I asked Magnus for a favor at his house and Alec was there."

"You said that you needed help?" Jace asked. "Can we go to the Institute and sort this out?" I asked nervously. "Ya I need a shower" Isabelle piped in.

Alec sighed "alright, least go." So we went to the worst place on earth, but I wouldn't know that for a while.


	13. Chapter 13

The institute is beautiful. It looked about 20 stories high with the Angel Raziel right in front. I stared at it with wide eyes.

I heard someone chuckling behind me. I turned and scowled angrily "what's so funny?" I growled. I saw Jace laugh even harder and say "you look like this is the only place you have ever seen!"

"So what if it is" I said loudly. I turned on my heel and walked past the pews and to the elevator. I was starting to see darkness around the edges of my eyes. I slowed down.

The world is swaying around me. I am dizzy. I slowed down even more. I was gripping the pews while I was walking. I heard an unidentifiable voice behind me. "Clary, are you alright?"

Then the darkness took over and I fell into the abyss.

I heard voices. I opened my eyes slowly. I saw angels above me. Did I die? I blinked again. Damn it, just a painting. I looked around. The room is filled with beds similar to the one I am on. "Look whose finally awake." I looked over. Only Isabelle was in the room. "How long have I been out?" I asked in a raspy voice.

"6 days" she replied. Suddenly a pain radiated throughout my stomach. But I didn't show it, I never show pain because that shows weakness. Anyway I am probably just hungry.

"Here drink this, it's one of Hodges special remedies." I eyed her suspiciously. What is it? Who is Hodge? "You're probably hungry, this should help" Isabelle said like she was reading my thoughts.

I took a sip. It was surprisingly good. It tasted like berries. Before I knew it the remedy is gone and I am no longer hungry.

"Now what?" I ask her. "Now you change then you see Hodge" she replied handing me clothes. I stepped into the bathroom and quickly changed wondering who Hodge is. I looked into the mirror, wow I look good. The tight tank tops shows off my nonexistent curves and the leather jacket-that stops right above me stomach-matches the jeans.

I tried my best to tame my hair, but since I didn't have a brush it looked crazed. After a few minutes I gave up and put it in a side braid. Alright I thought not that bad.

I walked out of the bathroom and saw Isabelle talking quietly to Jace. When I closed the bathroom door they finally noticed me.

"Ah looks like our sleeping beauty awoke, who kissed you awake?" Jace asked. "Nobody" I replied "I woke up on my own."

Isabelle sighed "Jace stop being an ass, Hodge is ready for her." "Who is this Hodge guy?" I asked. "Hodge is our tutor, and the Institutes caretaker" Isabelle informed me.

"Come on, I'll take you to Hodge" Jace started while walking "now, you may find Hodge a little eccentric but he is one of the best shadowhunters that ever lived." I snorted. Ya, right. "Also," Jace continued "he is the only shadowhunter that has ever beaten me."

"So your saying that you're the best shadowhunter of this generation?" I asked him. "Yes I am" he replied smugly. "Bet I could beat you!" I exclaimed "how about I rematch later?" "Yes" he replied immediately. He has no idea what he is in for.

"Here is the door to the library, don't forget what I said" Jace reminded me. "Ya ya I won't I replied stepping through the door.

Like the front of the institute, the library is beautiful. There are so many books, it is incredible! A voice brought me out of my thoughts "you said that you needed our help?" I turn my head left. Found him. "Yes, I do. I am hiding from my father, Valentine Morgenstern, he is looking for me and the last place he would ever look is the Clave."

Hodge pondered over this for a moment. "You can stay here until the Lightwoods come home, then they will decide what will happen" oh thank the Angel! "Thank you so much."

"Your welcome" he started kindly "Church will show you to your room, Isabelle's room will be across from yours, Jaces to the left, Alec's diagonal." I replied "thank you again, and who is Church?" He pointed to a blue, fat cat.

Is he crazy? That cat won't know where the hell to take me. The cat, or Church, started walking to the door and into the hallway. Might as well follow him. Surprisingly he led me right to a bedroom door.

I am tired, might as well go to sleep. So I walked over to the bed, curled up into a ball, and fell asleep.

I see Sebastian. He is in the Institute. He stepped toward me. By the Angel, what do I do? I stumbled backward, trying to get away from him, but he is to fast. In an instant he shoved me to the floor and pinned my arms above my head.

His legs were on both sides of my waist. He started kissing my neck. "You cannot hide from me Clarissa" he whispered against my neck. His hand slipped under my shirt and grasped my boob.

I am panicking. This can't be happening. I left, I escaped! This won't happen, I will make sure of it. "Help, someone help!" I screamed. I kept screaming that at the top of my lungs. I shut my eyes tightly and kicked, punched whatever I could do. It wasn't enough, Sebastian took my clothes off.

I started hyperventilating and sobbing. "Help I need help" I shouted. Where is Jace or anyone for that matter? I kicked out again and heard an "ow!" But it wasn't Sebastian's voice,

I sat up and snapped my eyes open and saw only blurriness. I wiped the tears out of my eyes and saw Jace, Isabelle, and Alec looking at me with concern and wonder in their eyes. I was sticky and sweaty.

It was only a dream oh by the Angel it was only a dream. I blew out a breath and collapsed back on the bed. "Um Clary, are you ok?" I heard Isabelle say.

"I don't know Isabelle, I really don't know" I whispered loudly. My hair was sticking to me. "Um well ok we will be around the Institute if you need us" Isabelle said. I only nodded my head.

I heard two pairs of footsteps leave the room and close the door. "You know we really will help you Clary" Alec started "all of us will, even Jace he may be a cocky ass but when it comes down to serious stuff he is the only person I would even consider talking to."

"Thank you"I told him truthfully. Alec turned around and started toward the door.

"And Clary?" he said pausing at the door. "Yes"I said "be careful what you ask Jace, he will always tell the truth and sometimes you won't like the answer."

After a couple hours of sitting around and calming myself down I was ready to come out of the room. I stepped out of the room wondering where to go. I owe Jace a Match so might as well get it over with.

Luckily for me Church was plopped down the hall sleeping. "Chuuuurch" I said softly "can you take me to Jace?" Wow, I am so desperate to do something I am talking to a cat! Nice Clary, nice.

With a meow Church started on down the hall. Might as well follow him, what do I have to lose?

A few turns later I walked into the kitchen where Isabelle, Jace, and Alec were sitting around and talking. I cleared my throat to get their attention. "Oh hi Clary, are you hungry?" Alec asked me but I shook my head. "No thanks, I ate yesterday" I turned my attention to Jace "you ready?"

"Ummm what is she talking about? Ready for what?" Isabelle asked. Jace opened his mouth but before he could say a word I answered Isabelle.

"I was wondering if he was ready for the match I challenged him to."


	14. Chapter 14

"You challenged Jace to a match?" Alec asked me surprised. "Yes" I said simply wondering why he is surprised. "After all I am the third best shadowhunter of our generation" I went on.

"You are third, I am first" Jace said smugly. "No my brother is first, barely, and...and Se..Sebastian is second" I said barely choking out Sebastian because of all the painful memories.

"Who is Sebastian?" Isabelle asked. Instead of answering I turned to Jace, "so are you ready or are you to scared to get your ass beaten by a girl?" Alec told me "oh he's ready to fight and I am ready to watch!"

"Lead the way" I told them. They started showing me the way to the training room. "So Jace" I said "how do you want to play?" "What do you mean how do you want to play?" He asked clearly confused.

"Do you want to take it until one of us is unconscious or until someone would be killed by the others weapon. We can also play until someone forfeits." I said ending in a cough that sounded like "Jace."

"Ummm let's go with until someone would be killed by the others weapon" he said sounding a little nervous. "K" I replied.

We finally reached the weapons room and I threw off my jacket leaving me in a tank top and jean pants.

I turned around only to find a seraph blade being tossed toward me. I caught it easily and walked over to the middle of the circle. "Ready to lose Goldilocks" I told him. He only smirked and attacked me. I easily blocked it and yawned. "Oh did we start yet? I didn't notice."

Then I started attacking him full speed. Goldilocks is pretty good though, I have to give him that, he blocked all of my attacks for a few minutes until he realized that he is losing, then he ran to the wall and did an incredibly long backflip landing on the other side of me.

I just ran to the wall and did a backflip over him too, but he didn't expect it so I quickly "stabbed" him. "Not bad Goldilocks, not bad."

I heard some clapping and hooting. "Oooohhh Jace just got crushed! Who knew this day would come?" Isabelle said dramatically.

"Certainly not me" Jace grumbled. "It wasn't really that hard, you are good but not me good" I told him with a smirk. He just huffed and stormed out of the room.

"Well that was rude" Isabelle commented. "Ahhhh don't worry about it, it's normal to be brat like after you get your ass crushed by a girl" I told them.

"What are your favorite choices in weaponry?" I asked them trying to start a conversation. "Well mine is the whip and Alec uses the bow and arrow" Isabelle stated "what is yours?" Wow, a whip is actually pretty tough, it was the longest weapon for me to learn how to use.

"I like all of them but my absolute favorite is the seraph blade." I informed them. I'm not really tired, maybe I could train. I looked around.

I haven't worked on landing in a long time, might as well. "Is there any way to raise the balance bar?" I asked hoping for a yes.

"Yes" Alec said and brought me over to the switch and showed me how. "Thanks!" I exclaimed.

I raised it until it was about 40 feet in the air. Then I climbed the ladder and balanced on the beam. I did simple things like cartwheels, front hand springs, ect.

Then I started to get into the more complicated stuff. I front flips and back flips landing perfectly each time.

Alright, time for the big finale. I felt their eyes on me, watching my every move. I crouched down and jumped off the beam, doing a couple flips, twists, and turns.

When I landed perfectly I heard everyone gasp. "Clary how did you do that without breaking any bones?" Isabelle asked in a wobbling voice.

What does she mean, can't everyone do that? "I thought everyone could do that. Even my brother a-and well everyone my age that I knew could do that." Confusion clear in my voice.

"I can even go higher if you want" I said not understanding. "No no no no no" Alec said worry in his voice "we don't need any broken bones!"

"I've jumped a 60 foot drop and didn't even ruin my hair, I think I'm good" I told him. "And anyway" I continued "that bar was sturdy, usually I practice on a wobbling bar."

"I think I will take a shower and go to sleep, I didn't get that much sleep before" I informed them. "Of course, I can show you to your room if you want?" Isabelle asked hopefully.

Oh thank you! "Sure" I started "I feel really stupid following a fat blue cat around." Isabelle laughed her tinkling laugh "ya I know what you mean!

At least she understands. "I might as well give you a tour of the entire institute, Church might not be with you all the time."

"That would help a lot, thanks" I replied, relieved.

After the tour Isabelle walked me back to my room. Once we reached the door, Isabelle said "I am going to sleep, see you tomorrow!"

"Goodnight" I told her with a yawn. Wow I am tired! I stepped into the bathroom, grabbed some towels, and took a quick shower.

As soon as I stepped our of the warm, relaxing shower I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around me. I don't want to see the marks Sebastian gave me.

I'm not ready. In fact I doubt I will ever be ready.


	15. Chapter 15

I stepped out of the bathroom, drying my hair with a towel. On the bed is a pile of clothes with a note. It read "I thought you might need some clothes, here are some that should fit you. -Isabelle"

Good, I don't really want to sleep naked

or walk over to Isabelle's room in only a towel. Thanks to Sebastian I am very self conscious about those things.

I looked through the pile and found some yoga pants and a tank top. After that I slipped under the covers and instantly fell asleep.

Sebastian is here again, but this time we are in the weapons room. I wish there is someone with us. "This isn't happening Sebastian" I said in a wobbly voice.

"You don't seem to sure of that" he told me with a smirk. Within the second he was on top of me and sucking in my breasts. What? Where the fuck is my shirt?

I swung out a fist. I punched, kicked, and bit him. Whatever I could do to hurt him, I did. When I was sure he wouldn't be able to move anymore I stepped back and examined his injuries.

It didn't take long considering there were none! Except this time he had a knife in his hand. Sebastian clicked his tongue. "Now now Clarissa, you misbehaved and I need to teach you a lesson. After all you are in my responsibility now."

With that said he lunged towards me and had me pinned to the ground. My forehead is on the ground in the most uncomfortable way possible.

I already promised myself that this wouldn't happen and it won't. Isabelle said that she would be here, maybe if I scream loud enough she will hear and save me from the monster.

"Help someone save me! Help, help" I shouted as loud as I possibly could. I kept screaming and thrashing around. Suddenly I felt the tip of a knife on my back.

Demon metal. Damn it! He carved something into my back and it hurt like hell! It hurt more then usual. My back felt like agony has a kid and pain adopted it.

I screamed from the pain. It hurt so bad. Tears were streaming down my face. I couldn't handle the pain, and I can always handle pain, but I couldn't handle this. No one could.

When the tip if the knife left my back Sebastian told me "since the other initials didn't work, we made sure this will."

"Stay the hell away from me!" I screamed louder then I ever have before. "We will find you, just remember that." I heard him shout at me.

I started punching him again. I shut my eyes tightly. I started kicking, punching and screaming. "Ow" I heard him say.

I hurt him?! How? I snapped my eyes open only to find Jace and Alec trying to hold me down. I immediately stopped, not wanting to hurt them.

He said that he will find me. I curled up into a tight little ball, as small as possible. Is the dream really just a dream? I shifted around. I felt horrible pain in my back. I whimpered and froze.

My back. The place where dream Sebastian marked me. His voice floated through my head "since the other initials didn't work, we made sure this did." I started trembling. The dream is real. My face is wet with tears in seconds. The dream is real. I am hyperventilating. The dream is real. The dream is real.

"Um Jace you might want to take a look at this." I heard Alec say faintly. "What happened to her back? Alec call Magnus, I'll get Isabelle to help."

I heard nothing but my sobs for what seemed like hours. In fact, the more I waited the more it increased. Finally I heard someone come in.

"Is her back supposed to be bleeding so much?" I heard Isabelle start "let me clean her back and try to heal the um, well, whatever happened here."

Am I really bleeding that much? How did the dream come through into reality? So many questions, so little answers. I felt someone try to lift up the back of my shirt.

Who would do that? Sebastian, he's here. He is behind me. He is trying to rape me again. I whimpered loudly and tried to wiggle away from him.

He wouldn't give up. Jace. Jace, Alec, and Isabelle will help! I screamed so loud even a sound proof room wouldn't contain it.

"Damn it Clary" I heard a females voice through my shouting, "clam down it's just me Isabelle!"

Isabelle. Not Sebastian, Isabelle. I shut up instantly and tried to calm down. In a minute I was still crying hard, but not as hard as before, and trembling, just as hard, in a tight ball.

"That's better" I heard her say soothingly. She is pulling up my shirt now. No no no!

I was back to hyperventilating. I quickly pulled my shirt back down. "Shhhh calm down Clary" said a calming voice "I'm going to help you, to heal you." To help me. To help me.

The words were echoing in my mind. To help. Let her help and nothing more. Just let her pull up your shirt a little in order to access the marks.

She started pulling my shirt up. Stay calm Clary, stay calm I told myself. You can trust Isabelle.

I felt some rough cloth on my back. She must be wiping the blood off. A couple minutes later I felt the familiar sting of the stele, no doubt putting an iratze on.

"Jace!" I heard Isabelle call out, "the iratze, it isn't working." "Damn it, what the hell happened to her anyway?" They can't know. They will never know.

"When will Magnus be here? She is loosing to much blood!" someone shouted. Am I really loosing that much?

The door to my bedroom opened. "Everyone out!" Magnus instructed. When the door finally closed I felt hands on my back. I winced and whimpered from the pain.

"I know Claire, I know" he whispered soothingly. With a full minute full of whispers, the pain was gone in an instant and I was just left there trembling on the bed with tears streaming down my face.

I felt him sit on the bed. "Come here Clare Bear" he said softly. Slowly, I uncurled myself from the tight ball I was in and turned so that my head was on his chest with my knees curled up against his side.


	16. Chapter 16

"What's wrong Clare Bear?" He asked

me quietly. "Everything" I whimpered. It's true. Everything is wrong, once I escaped I was supposed to be free. But instead I'm just as trapped before as I am now.

"The dream is real" I confided in him in a whisper. I just couldn't seem to stop shaking. "Can I see it?" He asked me curiously.

I whimpered slightly, and dug my head into Magnus's side. He has already seen where I was and what happened to me. I might as well show him this.

I nodded my head slightly. His fingers were hesitantly put on the sides of my head. I lay there shaking for what seemed like eternity until Magnus took his fingers off the sides of my head. "Wow" he said bluntly.

I let out a tiny laugh besides myself. "Ya I guess you could say that." "Oh no" Magnus began dramatically "the Great Clare has laughed, the world must be coming to an end!"

I let out a louder giggle and said "Thanks Magnus, for everything." "No problem, no problem" he replied with a smile. I dug my head into his side again. "I don't think I can face them" I murmured.

"Then you stay here," Magnus started "and get some rest." "The dreams" I whispered fearfully.

"Yes well dreams happen when you're asleep, you will not be asleep but instead a certain kind of knocked out" with that said, Magnus snapped his fingers and everything went black.

I slowly opened my eyes accompanied with a yawn. Hey no nightmares, well I was passed out but I still feel rested!

I looked at the clock. 9 AM. That is the latest I have ever slept in. Wow. That is kinda sad.

All of a sudden I felt an immense pain in my stomach. I felt nauseated. I sprinted to the bathroom, lucky that I made it there in time. It feels like my stomach is turning upside down, squeezing itself.

Once I was positive that everything is out of my stomach I stopped puking and sat my burning body against the cool tiles. I closed my eyes and relaxed. This feels good.

"Magnus told me this would happen" I heard a males voice pierce through the silence. I let out a yelp and sprung my eyes open, relieved to only find Alec there. "Don't ever scare me like that again" I warned him dangerously.

He held his hands up in defeat, "ok, ok calm down." I opened my mouth to say something when I felt the nausea again. This time I made it to the toilet with plenty of time to spare.

I kneeled down over the toilet and retched up the acids in my stomach. My throat is burning. My stomach is burning. I am burning.

I felt my hair be pulled back away from my face gently. When I finally stopped throwing up I collapsed against Alec, all my energy I once owned gone. I let out a groan.

I felt Alec get up and go to the sink. I heard water running. A few minutes later it stopped and I felt a cold rag on the back if my neck.

I let out a sigh of relief. I opened my eyes and thanked Alec. He only returned it with a smile and sat down beside me. I tipped my head on his shoulder and closed my eyes. My heated body was starting to cool down when someone thundered "what the hell is going on in here?"

I snapped my eyes open and jumped up finding a very mad Jace. His face was red and I could tell he was holding himself back.

The sight was so ridiculous I started laughing. I couldn't seem to stop, pretty soon I was sitting down on the floor trying to calm myself down. Jace, a guy a barely know freaking out because I am sitting in the bathroom with his brother.

"It could be worse," I said wanting to mess with him, "we could have no clothes on like last night." The look on his face was priceless. He was shocked and surprised and angry.

I started laughing so much harder then before. I barely heard Alec explaining to Jace what was going on. I started burning up again. When I was pretty sure I would be 110 degrees Fahrenheit I calmed down immediately.

It became harder and harder to breathe. The air became thick. "Clary are you ok?" I heard Jaces alarmed voice cut through the air.

My vision became blurry, so I barely saw Jace touch my arm and jump back with a hiss. "It's not normal to be that hot."

I would have came up with a smart remark if I could talk, but I felt as if I were melting. Alec and Jaces frantic voices felt like they were miles away, and for the second time in 24 hours, I passed out.

**I have been getting reviews that I am stealing from other fanfics but I assure you that this is all my own work, except for the characters. **


	17. Chapter 17

When the world finally came back to me, I quickly sat up and started to involuntary gasp for air. "Calm down, calm down" a worried Jace said.

Once I calmed down, which didn't take long, I looked around the room I was in, it was my room, and only Jace was in there. "How long have I been out?" I asked Jace in wonder. "Only a half hour, nothing to worry about. When you passed out we just dropped you in the bathtub filled with freezing water, clothes and all."

I looked down, relieved to see that the same clothes as a couple hours ago were still there. "After ten minutes in the tub," Jace continued "where you nearly drowned yourself 38 times, we decided to just put you on your bed with a towel underneath you and the fan on. That helped you cool down quicker." How come he knew exactly how many times I drowned?

"Um ok, I guess, uh thanks?" I said awkwardly with a quick smile. Jace just laughed. I looked away quickly. How come he knew exactly how many times I "drowned."

My stomach growled loudly. "Are you hungry?" Jace asked alarmed. He looked super worried. "I guess I'm a little hungry, Mother," I told him with a smirk on my face.

"Haha your hilarious" his voice swimming with sarcasm. "What're we eating," I wondered aloud. I walked towards the walk in closet to change.

I closed the door and picked out a snug black shirt, short jean shorts, and heeled knee-high boots. "Well, I make a mean cheese sandwich," Jace told me his voice floating through the door like music-wait. Why am I thinking this?

I stepped out of the closet and said "sounds great!" He nodded his angelic face and turned around to walk to the kitchen.

I followed slowly, my gaze unable to tear away from him. He is beautiful. Wait. Clary stop this. He is probably going to use you like Sebastian.

Not probably, defiantly. All men are pigs, and all they want is sex.

I sped up to catch up to him, trying to act cold. A pungent odor filled my nose which made Jace halt to a stop. He grabbed my arm and dragged me down the hall while sprinting.

"What are you doing?" I asked trying not to freak out. "Shhhhhh Isabelle is cooking," he hissed. "So, I'm hungry" I stated.

"You don't understand, once she tried to make a grilled cheese sandwich and, don't ask me how, but the bread was frozen and the cheese was burnt. Another time, she tried to make chicken noodle soup and instead if chicken broth she put in vinegar and the chicken was ham! You hear me Isabelle cannot cook, don't ever eat her cooking. Another time she made Alec pass out for a few days because he ate one if her empanadas. Don't even get me started-" "okay okay, I get it, don't eat Isabelle's cooking."

He looked relieved. "Now where and what do we eat I'm hungry!" I explained.

"It's a surprise!" He exclaimed while pulling me playfully down the hall. "And then to make sure Isabelle is done with her horrible cooking, I will show you around my favorite parts of New York." Wonderful, I get to spend my day gallivanting around New York with the sexual pig I might be in love with.

An hour later we walked up to a building. Or at least what counts as one, barely. The roof was falling in on the middle and it was such a faded color you couldn't even tell what it is. I squinted my eyes and read the outline of the letters that were supposed to be filled in with paint. Takis.

I looked at Jace in bewilderment. "Seriously, you could have taken me anywhere but-" Jace cut me off "don't judge a book by its cover," and glided inside.

I let out a huff of exasperation and stormed after him. "Table for two," I heard Jace say as I stormed in after him. I looked around and it was more luxurious then I expected.

The walls are a clean white, ad the booths look like a brand new black, also clean and shiny. The waitress showed us to our table and left, leaving two menus behind. "So," I began awkwardly, "what's good on the menu?"

"Anything" Jace replied, "turn over the menu and you will find an assortment of downworlder foods." Wonderful, lots of downworlders who most likely know me. I'm sure Magnus would be scared of me if he didn't know my past. Or who I actually am.

"And don't eat any Fay Food or else you will be running down Madison Avenue naked with antlers on your head. Not" he said hastily, "that that has ever happened to me." I smirked at him to let him know that I knew it happened to him.

Our waitress came over glaring at me and turned all her attention to Jace. "So Jacey, last night was fun we should do that again," she said in a high pitch flirty voice. Jacey? Seriously? I tried to stifle a laugh but it came out as a snort. To quickly cover my tracks I started coughing.

"Um ya" he told her smoothly, "it was great, Kailey(I forgot how to spell her name plz help!). I'll have my usual..." He let the sentence trail off.

"Of course Jacey!" She let out a little giggle. Then she turned to me her smile immediately dropping, "what do you want?" she asked me in a monotone voice. "Um, a waitress with a personality?" I told her.

I heard Jace snort so I looked up at his flawless face- stop it Clary. He was biting his lip, trying very hard to not laugh. "Coconut pancakes it is" she said coolly, "would you like any coffee with that?" "Black like your soul," I told her with a smile.

With a humph she stalked off and I heard Jace chuckle under his breath. "So what is is with Little Miss Flirt over there?" He opened his mouth to respond when I heard someone next to me breath "Jocelyn." My mothers name.

Within the second I had the man on the table, me over him, and a sword to his neck. I examined the man. He had dark brown curly hair, glasses, looked about my moms age, and chocolate eyes. He is a werewolf. "How do you know my mothers name, werewolf?" He looked bewildered. "Mothers?"

"Answer me," I screamed at him. By now I was pretty sure everyone in the restaurant was looking at us but I don't care. I felt hands trying to pull me off of him but I don't care. They could try to pull me off, but I will kill them first.

"Stop," I heard his voice loud, clear, and firm. All their hands freezed except for one which slowly traveled to my butt. "Whosever hand that is might want to pull it away if they want to keep it," the hand immediately stopped.

"But sir, she could kill you" I heard several protests. "She knows me, she just doesn't know it yet. Anyway, she trusts me, she just doesn't know that either." He turned his attention to me, "hello, I'm Luke."

Luke. Luke. Luke. The name sounded familiar.

FLASHBACK

"There was this amazing man," my mother started "that I think you are old enough to know about. His name was Luke Garroway. He had dark curly hair/eyes and wore glasses. He was my best friend and I started falling for him-"

"why do you keep saying was?" I asked my mother. "Because h-he died," then she ran out of the room sobbing. We never mentioned his name again.

PRESENTTIME

I blinked my eyes a few times to make sure I am in the present. I took the blade off his neck "you have 10 minutes Garroway, don't waste it."

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	18. Chapter 18

Luke pulled up a chair just as our food came. "Wonderful," I said with fake enthusiasm "a dinner and a story."

Like sighed.

"It all started in High School in Alicante. Jocelyn an I have been friends for our entire lives and I was in love with her. I wasn't a very good student, probably a C+ student. Valentine, well he was an A+ student. So charming, amazing fighter, now I obviously see it was just a ploy. He started a group called the circle, it started out a silly little club where we critique the Claves ideas. Jocelyn and I got in and Valentine and I actually became Parabati. Valentine took an interest in Jocelyn and asked her out, she obviously said yes. They dated for a while everything running smoothly. I became Valentines second-in-command. And then Valentines parents died on a vampire raid. He became more corrupt and The Circle became more intense. Instead of just sitting around, talking, and sending ideas to The Clave (which they mostly ignored) Valentine said we should do something about it, go on hunts for the downworlders. All of us were under his influence so we agreed. A few months later I was becoming suspicious of Valentine so I confronted him about it. He, of course, denied it and charmed me back in again. I was still a little suspicious, but not as much as before. That very night, Valentine and I went on a werewolf hunt. Valentine was supposed to be watching my back, but he disappeared without me noticing, and I got bit. When the full moon rose a week or so later I didn't know what I was doing. I was just in so much pain. I went to Valentines house, when your mother saw me she was hysterical, crying and all that. When Valentine saw me he led me outside, gave me his prized knife and told me to kill myself. He walked away and it was right then and there I realized what he truly was, a monster. Then I left the knife and ran off. A few years later I kept thinking about what I did and I went to tell Jocelyn what Valentine truly is, because I never stopped loving her, but she wasn't there. No one was there, nothing. Morgenstern Manor was just a pile of charred wood. I thought she was dead, right until I saw you."

His eyes were moistened with tears. He handed me a business card and told me "if you ever need me, you know where to go."

I nodded mutely, unable to say or do anything. I was shocked to tell you the least. How could Valentine do that? Honestly I'm not really shocked about the werewolf thing but more so about the Valentine taking Jocelyn from Luke.

I just sat there for minutes on end until Jace snapped his fingers in front of my face. "What?" I snapped at him, on instinct. I secretly put the business card in my boot.

"Whoa, I was just going to say we should leave the restaurant and go back to the Institute," he said. "What about the tour?" I asked him frowning.

"Well I thought you might want to do that another time considering the information you just got," he softened up a little "that must have been quite the shocker," "you have no idea," I murmured quietly. "What?" He asked me lightly.

"Quite the opposite actually, I need to just relax and not think about any of this stuff for a while," Jace immediately brightened up. "Great! Let's go," he threw a 20 down on the table, grabbed my arm gently and pulled me out the door."

ARROWS

Jace pulled me all around town. The Statue of Liberty, Belvedere Castle, and the most popular downworlder places. But my most famous one was the one he took me to at the end.

It was a 10 minute walk from the Institute, behind a building in worse condition then Takis but absolutely beautiful in its own way. Behind the building was a small group of trees.

The ginormous trees were two layers, in a not quite perfect circle and had so much moss hanging off of them that it reached the floor and you could barely see in it. I stepped into the ring of trees and found grass that nearly reached my waist, and exotic flowers in an assortment of colors.

"Wow," I breathed out. The perfect amount if sunlight found its way through the branches and onto us. "I thought you might like it," Jace told me.

Suddenly a rune entered my eyes and I quickly drew it on a tree nearby. It read caretaker. The grass was down to my ankles and soft, the flowers seemed that much more colorful and vibrant.

"When I first came to the Lightwoods when I was 5, I was so scared and alone. I came here every night while the Lightwoods were asleep and just looked up at the stars and plants, I even practiced fighting once in a while." Jace hesitated, " I've never told anyone that, not even Alec."

"Then why did you tell me?" I asked him curiously. "Because I think I'm falling for you," he replied in a loud whisper. I just looked at him shocked until he continued on "I tried to get you out of my head. Last night, with

KAILIE

but it didn't feel as right. It felt different."

"Whenever we feel something wrong let's let the other person know and we should meet up here between 12-1, like you did." I paused "My father, Valentine Morgenstern, wasn't the usual father. Whenever I lost a match, he whipped me. Whenever I gave him back-talk, he whipped me. The list goes on and on. But he whipped me with demon metal, not regular steel." I took a deep breath, I tried continuing but I just couldn't.

I took deeper breaths and decided to not tell him that part. "And why did you tell me that?" He asked me in a whisper. "Alec said I could trust you," I replied, also in a whisper. "And I also think I'm falling for you."

In that moment he walked up to me and kissed me. It made my entire body warm and tingly. He kissed me hard and full of passion.

That was until my brain caught up with me. What am I doing? I pulled back and looked at his angelic face, "I'm sorry but I just...I can't." And I couldn't even look at his face so I ran, letting my feet take me wherever they want to go.


	19. Chapter 19

The next couple weeks flew past in a flurry. Over the weeks Iz kept trying to make me eat her cooking(and call her Iz), I avoided Jace and he avoided me but Kailie came over every night, Alec held me in the morning when I got sick from the unpregnantcy potion, I trained every hour I possibly could, and I could begin to tell the difference between the nightmares an reality. In every single nightmare, Sebastian says "we made sure these marks would work," and "we will find you."

Jace kept trying to get me to "our spot" as he puts it, but I just ignore him causing Kailie to come over. Overall it's been better then before. That's what I call my time before I came here. Before.

I was in my room sketching-Iz took me shopping-when Jace came in my room. "Have you ever heard of knocking?" I asked him sarcastically. He ignored the comment and sat down on the bed next to me.

"We need to talk," he said firmly. "There is nothing to talk about," I shot back at him. "Clary, please" he looked at me with those eyes. Oh those eyes could make me melt in a second! "Fine," I relented, "12-1, you know the spot."

He smiled, a real smile, and said happily "our spot! Oh and by the way we have a new visitor, only staying for a night or two."

I nodded, surprised. We've never had a visitor. Only, well this is the first time since I have been here. I heard my phone go off. I swiped at the screen, it obviously couldn't be a lot of people. The only people on my contacts were Iz, Alec, Jace, Magnus, and Simon(a vampire whom Iz is dating).

Dinner time! It read from Iz. I sighed at her enthusiasm and headed downstairs to the dining room. I got to the dining room quickly. As soon as I entered the dining room, I realized that I was the last one there. Jace, Alec, Iz, and...Sebastian?

I took a step back and calmed my breathing down, lucky that no one saw me. I counted to 10 and walked in confidently. "Hey," I told them casually, "whose the new guy?"

"I'm Sebastian Verlack, their cousin." He 'introduced' himself. Cousin? I didn't respond, I turned to Jace and told him "I need some air." I walked out and waited for him. I needed to tell him who Sebastian was. I just hope he understood the message.

I heard the door open, I turned thankful-Sebastian. Not Jace, Sebastian. "What are you doing here?" I spat at him. "Now now feisty one I'm just here to take my adorable wife home." He replied sweetly.

I positioned myself in the common defense stance. "Oh I really hoped it wouldn't come to this," he sighed, brought out a gun, and shot me. The darkness welcomed me.


	20. AN 3

Hi guys, just wanted to let you know I will not be updating until after Friday. There a very important test coming up that will count as 30% of my entire grade, and I really don't feel like redoing this course. I hope you understand. But don't forget that I'm never to busy to read reviews. I read te reviews off my phone, so remember REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!


	21. Chapter 20

At first the darkness was peaceful, a break from everything going wrong in my life, but then it started to become boring forcing me to think about what was going wrong outside the darkness. Did Iz, Alec, and Jace get me? Am I with Sebastian? By the angel I hope not!

Then I started needing to know what was going on. Outside the darkness that wouldn't let me awake. I frantically tried, time after time, but the light wouldn't come so I gave up. I relaxed thinking the light would come to me. I soaked in the darkness, waiting.

Finally, after what felt like eternity, I saw light. It wasn't much at first but then it started coming to me faster and faster until I was in the real world, in the light.

I tried sitting up but it was useless considering I was chained up where I last escaped. I was in a thin white bra and thong. What a surprise!

"I see your awake," Sebastian said cooly while getting up and stretching, "about time that chair is uncomfortable." "Then why didn't you put me in the bed like usual" I shot back, the venom couldn't have been more clear.

"Because," he started, clearly exasperated "if I left you alone and you awoke then escaped your father would quite literally kill me. If you were on the bed I would have gotten all bothered." He gave me a wink while I vomited in the back if my throat.

He snatched a smoothie off the counter and shoved the straw into my mouth none too gently. "Besides I thought you might be hungry," he added as an afterthought.

I was hungry...he probably poisoned it Clary, don't be an idiot! I refused to drink it and stared him down. "Aw Clary don't be like that." I still wouldn't drink.

He sighed and pulled the straw out if my mouth, out of the smoothie, an onto the floor. Within a second his body was pressed up against mine and his finger ghosting my crotch.

I gasped, shocked, while he shoved the tip if the glass in my mouth. Then he shoved his finger inside me making me swallow. And swallow, and swallow until the entire drink was gone.

"Now," he said a smirk playing on his lips, "time for the real fun to begin."

HI I HAD SOME EXTRA TIME SO I IMMEDIATELY THOUGHT OF YOU GUYS, THIS IS ALL I COULD GET DONE. SORRY

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	22. Chapter 21

Sebastian undid the chains quickly, and carried me bridal style to the bedroom. He automatically chained me back up again, putting my feet in a belt, while I was thinking this isn't happening Clary, your just imagining this, this is a dream.

I knew it wasn't a dream, but it is the only hope I have. He slipped his clothes off and was immediately on top of me. "Your not escaping this time," he told me with a smirk. I stayed tense.

His fingers slipped under my bra, "relax" he ordered me. Do not do what he says Clary, stay strong. I relaxed.

No Clary, no. I tried to tense up again, but my body refused to cooperate. "That's a good girl," he said soothingly while stroking my breast.

He un clasped the bra while kissing a trail of wet, sloppy kisses down my stomach to my my crotch. His fingers were waiting for his mouth, "your wet for me" he stated. I squirmed uncomfortably.

He chuckled and pulled the underwear down with his teeth. Then he lifted my legs up a slipped between them, quickly entering me.

He was pumping in and out of me, before I knew it my hips were rising to meet his in a rhythmic motion. He smirked against my breast, realizing that I was "cooperating."

My breaths were coming out in short, quick pants. Sebastian is sweaty and getting tired. I am reaching my climax. I put my hands around Sebastian's neck, my fingers winding through his hair. I arched my back up against my will.

I reached my climax. I had to shout. "Sebastian!" He collapsed on top of me, exhausted, and fell asleep me right behind him.

I woke up with a heavy feeling on my chest. I groggily opened my eyes and looked at Sebastian sleepily. He couldn't be bothered to get out of me last night so I was extremely sore down there.

He woke up and got on his elbows, his hands under his chin holding his head up. He pulled out of me and silently unchained me, walking to the bathroom. I heard the door click close behind him.

I sat up thinking. Why would he unchain me? No, why would he unchain me and then leave me? That's a better suited question! Who cares, all of me screamed, let's get out if this place!

I got up and started running for the door, each of my steps getting slower and slower. Run my brain commanded my body, but I couldn't. Something was holding me back, forcing me back. Without realizing it, I was back on the bed sitting straight and tall.

I heard the shower running and Sebastian waltzed right back into the room. He smirked at me like he knew something I didn't. I tried to scowl back, but I couldn't so instead I just watched his naked body walk toward mine.

Once he reached me, he threw me over my shoulder and carried me into the steaming shower. There, he dropped me and stared. What to do.

I decided to ignore him and turned around to the varying soaps. I grabbed a soap at random and cleaned my body. I was all soapy when I felt Sebastian's lips against mine. His hand was on my butt the other on my shoulder.

I started kissing him back instantly, hating every minute of it. I tried pulling back, but it was no use. I was a prisoner inside my own body.

He pulled back, and slid down my already slippery body until he was on his knees, his face level with my crotch. He started kissing my crotch.

I automatically widened my thighs, doing small squat. Sebastian repositioned himself so that he was now sitting down and kissing there.

He moved himself under me so that his head was tilted back, kissing my entrance while his eyes were locked with my own. I couldn't look away. He couldn't look away. It was unbreakable. I couldn't think of anything except for what was happening.

His hands were through my legs, squeezing my butt, then his tongue went inside me. He rubbed his tongue on my clitoris. I moaned in pleasure, closing my eyes, finally breaking our eye lock.

I guided one of his hands to my boob without thinking about it. He exited me and moved back so he was facing my crotch again. He resumed kissing there again. My legs were starting to shake from being in the squat so long. I shifted my foot and slipped.

I landed so that I was on top of Sebastian, my legs straddling his. His hand moved his dick to right in front of my entrance. "Do it," I whispered to him daringly. Without a moments hesitation, he shoved his dick inside me. I pushed him down so I was laying on top of him.

I automatically moved my hips in a rhythm.

"I would love to continue this," he said between gasps, "but I have a meeting with your father and I don't want to be late." He gently pushed me off him and exited the shower, leaving me staring at him.

What the hell just happened Clary? Why did you fuckin do that! My feet moved on their own to follow him out of the shower. I wrapped a towel on me(very lowly might I add) and walked out to meet Sebastian.

He had some dress pants on but not much else. I couldn't control myself no matter how much I wished to. I put a hand on his chest, my body pressed up against his and said like a whiney girl "do you have to go."

"I'm afraid so, my dear," he replied smoothly, "but don't worry we will continue right where we left off." With that said, he pulled the towel off me. His lips went between my breasts while his fingers ghosted my entrance causing my nether regions to warm up.

His lips traveled up to my mine, making his tongue slip into my mouth. He kept teasing me with his finger. I shut my eyes tightly, unable to think again.

Suddenly, he was gone and I was left there panting with my eyes closed tightly.


	23. Chapter 23

I lay there breathing for a few minutes. Not thinking, just breathing. When I finally found the courage to open my eyes, all I found was an empty room. I got up slowly, wondering what I was going to do for the next...well who knows how long.

I spotted a dress on the bed. Oh by the angel I did not want to wear that. But I put it on anyway, I still couldn't control myself. It is horrible!

I went to the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror. The dress was strapless and clingy. It had a sweetheart neckline and stopped mid-thigh. All in all, not the worst dress Sebastian ever put me in.

I didn't really know what to do so I just sat and waited.

I heard a door slam shut so I awoke from my daydreaming. By the angel I miss Jace. I also miss Iz and Alec, but mostly Jace. The way he would look at me would make me melt and my heart pump faster.

I was broken out of my thought by the bedroom door opening and closing. I turned to face Seb-"Jonathan?" I squeaked out. "Hello sister, I came to check on you." Translation: we wanted to make sure you didn't run away again.

"I see Sebastian has improved on his fashon taste," he said studying me. I blushed fiercely, wishing he would walk away. But he did the exact opposite, he walked towards me, putting his hand down my dress.

In reaction, I did the thing any sane girl would do if she were put in my position. I slapped him. And hard too. After that came a couple punches and kicks. He responded by attacking me. I punched, he kicked, I jumped over his kick, and it continued like that.

Finally, a thought hit me. If I could get to the weapons room, I could beat him. He wouldn't have a weapon after all.

So I bolted out of the room as fast as I could with an injured leg. I tried remembering the way the best I could. Finally when I thought I reached the weapons room I opened it. Yes!

I heard thumping so I turned to see. Jonathan was right behind me. I sprinted into the room and automatically grabbed a weapon. Great, a dagger, not the best weapon but at least it's something.

As soon as Jonathan stepped through the door, I pounced. It would have worked great, if not for the fact that he had a seraph blade in his hand. He easily blocked, and started attacking me.

I automatically was put on defense. I got a few stabs in as well as Jonathan. We can say that he got a few stabs more then me. I waited for the right moment to come, and when it did I stepped and stabbed.

Most of the color left my brothers face. I just killed my own brother. And I didn't fell anything wrong about it.

I stumbled back, unsure about what I was doing until I felt the familiar tornado-like spin if the portal. My vision got blurry. I wiped my face trying to get the tears off my face when I realized there were none.

I must have lost a lot more blood then I originally thought. I looked around trying to figure out where I was. I recognized it as Jace's and my spot. I started getting dizzy so I grabbed a flower clumsily off a tree, lay down, and looked at the stars. If the last thing I saw was the stars, then so be it.

I was tired. I pulled the flower closer to my nose and closed my eyes. Death took me quickly.

Hey guys! KEEP READING THE STORY. ITS NOT EVEN CLOSE TO OVER!

And yes, I will write more stories, I have more ideas. I just want to write one story at a time.


	24. Chapter 24

I woke to the sound of voices. "Do you think she will be ok?" Iz! I escaped! I'm alive! All that excitement disappeared once I realized how I got here. I killed my brother.

I'm not really disappointed about him, I'm disappointed about the brother I would have had. I know my father put demon blood in my brother, when I was younger I fantasized about finding a way to cure him.

Now that's not going to happen, I wanted to save him but instead I killed him. I opened my eyes but didn't respond to Iz's enthusiasts to my awakening.

I just stared straight forward, making sure no emotion seeped onto my face. I felt Magnus try to put his hands on the side of my forehead to try to see what happened to me, but I slapped them away. I already put enough of this junk on him, he isn't going to get any more.

Day in, day out I ignored Alec, Isabelle, Magnus and Hodge, only eating one meal a day. I could tell they were worried about me. They talked to me all day hoping to get a response. There was one person who didn't visit me though, Jace. Iz and Alec kept telling me how hard he's been taking this. How much he missed me since I've been gone. How every night between 12-1 he's been disappearing.

Well, if he missed me that much he would have visited me by now. I mean seriously, I haven't even seen him once. Why didn't he visit me? I miss him, I need him. But I guess he doesn't need me.

I heard footsteps walk into the room. They weren't Iz's heels, or Magnus's thudding, or Alec's gentle footsteps, no these footsteps were soft. Almost like a silent brother but not so creepy. Jace.

I decided to give him the silent treatment since he obviously doesn't care much about me. Well I've been giving everyone the silent treatment lately but with Jace I'm actually responding. Responding in a bad way.

I glared at the wall and folded my arms across my chest. I heard him sigh and sit down next to me. He tried to hold my hand so I snatched it away and smacked him, like I did to Magnus.

"I understand why your mad at me," he said sadly, "I left you in the hallway, I know I should have come sooner. All of this is my fault. I'm sorry, I should have apologized sooner but I couldn't stand to see you mad at me. I'm a coward." He sounded completely broken.

I couldn't help but glance over, his eyes were puffy from not sleeping, he had bags under his eyes that you would be able to see from a mile away, and his body was slumped in defeat. How can I blame him for that? How?

He started getting up but I grabbed his hand. He immediately stopped and looked into my eyes. I stared back and saw hope in his eyes. He missed me. Jace missed me!

My heart leaped with joy once I realized that. The real question was, did he love me?

And I'm not sure if I will like the answer.


	25. Chapter 25

I pulled him on the bed next to me. Silently, I put my head on his chest and all was forgiven. He wrapped an arm around me, I felt so safe. So protected from the outside world. All that was happening in my life dispersed.

He kissed the top of my head and I felt the difference between him and Sebastian. Sebastian was rough, treating me like his slave. But Jace, oh Jace, he treated me like I was delicate but not made of porcelain glass. Jace treats me like he cares.

I snuggled into his chest when I heard a scream. Iz sprinted into the room and took in the sight of us. "Seriously Iz, we didn't need to hear you scream!" Jace told Iz while rubbing his ears.

"But I couldn't help it," she squealed "you two are so cute together!" I sighed and rolled my eyes. I honesty hated girls like that, but I couldn't hate Iz no matter how many times she tried to shove her god awful food down my throat.

I pushed down the covers and swung my legs to the side of the bed. I tried standing up but my legs wobbled too much so I almost fell. I would have fallen if Jace didn't catch me. I smiled to him again, and thought about how much I love him.

That resulted in another squeal from Iz.

She skipped out of the room singing "Clary and Jace sittin in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G!" I blushed furiously, trying to hide the blush with my hair.

I started walking unsteadily to the room I stayed in. I was so tired that I could fall asleep on the floor. I wobbled a little to the left but Jace was there, as always, to help steady me. I knew he wouldn't always be there for me. No one could, after all they will come back. It happened once and it will happen again, my life will never be normal no matter how much I wish it would be.

Jace helped me all the way back to my room. He stopped in front of the door and looked down at me. We didn't say a word, just stared at each other until he leaned down to kiss me. He kissed me on the lips, hard.

I stiffened when memories of kissing came back. Kissing Sebastian. "So beautiful," Jace whispered against my lips. Sebastian said that all the time. Memories kept flashing back at me like a whirlwind. They wouldn't stop even though I wished they would.

I felt hot tears run down my cheeks, "stop," I whispered pleadingly. I felt Jace pull back but the memories kept coming. Finally I screamed "stop," and they stopped, just like that.

My vision was blurred with tears. I pulled open the door and slammed it behind me locking it. Why did all of this happen to me? Why not anybody else? Well I know I couldn't put them through that. I sank to the ground.

I put my knees to my chest and dug my head into my knees, wrapping my arms around me. I made myself as small as I possibly could, wishing would disappear.

I cried as silently as I could, barely making any noise. Jaces voice floated through the door "Clary are you okay?" I didn't respond. How could I respond to a question like that? I didn't even know how I felt!

His voice became worried, "Clary? Clary are you okay? I'm coming in." The door handle jiggled as he tried to open it. He cursed.

Why did I have sex with Sebastian? It's one thing to be raped it's a completely different thing to have sex. I could have run, but I didn't, I'm despicable! "Okay, Clary I'm going to break down the door, understand?" Good luck with that I thought only a moment before I flew a couple feet forward with the momentum of the shattered door pieces.

I laid on the floor silently sobbing. What happened to me? Before I hated Sebastian, now my brain get numb and I can't control my body whenever I get close to him. Am I in love with Sebastian? No I couldn't be. I would never love him, that hate still burns.

"Clary? A-are you okay?" Jaces voice broke through my thoughts. In what world would I be okay? "Clary?" Jace shifted so that he was next to me. He put his arm around me, trying to comfort me, but I wiggled and slapped him. I would do anything to get away from him. Anything so he wouldn't see how weak I am.

"Get out," my voice trembled. Through my tears I saw his hurt expression, then it hardened into refusal. He pounced on top of me, holding me down. His legs straddled mine, his arms holding mine down.

A memory came back of Sebastian doing this to me. The horrible memories that haunt me. I forgot where I was for a second and started flailing around. I screamed, shouted, what ever it would take. I needed to get away from Sebastian.

"Shhh shhh it's okay, I promise it's okay," Jaces voice whispered in my ear. I finally remembered where I was and calmed down enough so I was silently sobbing and shaking. I dug my head into the crook of Jaces neck.

"Shhhh I got you, your okay," his soothing voice told me. He sat up against the wall, pulling me with him. I sat in his lap with his arms around me, holding me close.

I calmed down soon enough, but I couldn't seem to stop shaking. I sniffled aloud and felt Jace stroke my hair. "What happened to you?" he asked me, obviously full of concern. "You'd only hate me if I told you," I said miserably. How could he ever love me if he figured out that I murdered my brother.

"Clary, I could never hate you," he turned me around so that I was facing him, "no matter how much could I try I could never hate you." I could tell he spoke truthfully for there was that promise in his eye.

"I ju..I just can-can't okay?" I managed to get out. I start screaming when I think about it, how could I speak about it. Maybe later, in a couple years if they don't find me, I could tell Jace. After all I won't forget any details because I see it every night.

"Do you want to sleep in my room? After all you won't have much privacy with the door like that," he chuckled quietly, "sorry about that." I laughed quietly. Only Jace would feel bad about breaking my door to make sure I was alright.

Only Jace.

"So, do you?" he asked. "Do I what?" I asked only momentarily confused, "oh right uhhh" I thought about it. I'm not sure if I can trust another guy. At least not bedroom trust yet. But this is Jace, I can trust Jace. Right? Only one way to find out.

"Sure, let me just get changed first" I replied. "Okay," he said happily, "meet me in my room."

I turned ad got a shirt with cupped sleeves and long pants. I also put I a sports bra-can't hurt-since I will be sleeping with a guy. Oh god I can't believe I said yes, and I can't back out now.

I took a deep breath and walked out of my room and headed towards Jaces. I knocked a few times-I did NOT want to walk in there and see Jace naked!

He opened the door for me and I walked inside. It was so...bare. There was hardly any sentimental objects in there. Just a desk, some books, a bed, and one picture-that was turned down. "It's so-" "plain" Jace finished for me. "I was going to say empty but basically the same thing," I corrected with a shrug.

I walked over to the bed only thinking this is Jace he won't try anything on you. I slipped under the covers while Jace took his shirt off and put it in the hamper. "Wh-what are you doing?" I asked him nervously.

"Relax Clary, I'm just getting ready to sleep," he told me soothingly. I closed my eyes as a signal that nothing was going to happen except sleep. I felt the bed dip with the weight of Jace, he slowly put an arm around me. I opened my eyes, making sure I was still in Jaces room with Jace.

I was, thank the angel! I snuggled closer to Jace and closed my eyes, enjoying the warmth he gave me. I closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.

For the first time in forever, I didn't have nightmares.


	26. Chapter 26

ALEC POV...

I awoke to the sound of my alarm. Ugh my turn to take care of Clary. Not that I have anything against taking care of Clary, I just don't like getting up so early.

I slapped my hand against the snooze button of the alarm clock. I grabbed a random shirt from the closet and a pair of jeans. Barefoot, I walked down to the infirmary trying to wake up. Why can't Jace help out with Clary? Honestly, besides finding her in an ally as bringing her back here, he's done nothing.

I opened the door to the infirmary only to find it empty. That's not really a problem, she is probably just going to the bathroom or taking a shower.

5 minutes later. 10 minutes later. 15 minutes later is when I became nervous. She is never gone for this long. Never.

Be reasonable Alec, I thought, she probably went back to her room because the beds are uncomfortable. Not that I could blame her, I thought while walking to her bedroom, I hate those beds.

Once I reached her room I was fully awake. After all who wouldn't be awake when they see a broken down door! "Clary? Clary?" I whispered softy, praying that she is under the covers sleeping in her bed. Nope.

That's when I really started to panic. I sprinted to Jaces room where I hoped he would care enough to help.

JACE POV...

I blinked my eyes open a few times, disoriented. There was a small warm body pressed up against mine. I looked down at the beautiful red head.

I started twirling a piece of her blazing red hair in my fingers. She looked so peaceful in her sleep, so young. That's when I realized that I love her. I love Clary Morgenstern.

The door banged open and Alec came in looking panicked. "Jace it's Clary, she's-right here? Jace what did you do last night!" Alec went straight from panicked to furious. "What do you mean what did I do?" I asked confused. Alec has seen me with a number of girls, a large number of girls, what is so bad about this one?

"Did you freaking rape her last night? Oh by the Angel Jace tell me you didn't!" He said furious and worried. "Don't you know me at all? My god! It's like you don't even know me, do you even trust me anymore?Never not ever would I do that," I said now even more furious then he was. He looked taken aback.

"How do I know you didn't so that?" He said softly, "how do I know that I can trust you?" I was outraged, "you want to know why I wouldn't do that, it's because I freaking god damn love her!" I screamed at him.

Then a tiny, hopeful voice came from the tiny body next to me, "you love me?"

CLARY POV...

I woke up to someone twirling my hair. It was done with care as to not hurt me, obviously Jace. I relaxed and decided to enjoy this, after all how much longer until this will be gone? How much longer until they find me? I shook the thought away. Don't think, just relax.

I heard aloud thump of the door opening. Before I could make any assumptions I heard Alec sounding as worried as ever, "Jace it's Clary, she's-right here? Jace what did you do last night?" At the end of the statement Alec sounded furious. "What do you mean what did I do?" I heard Jace ask, confused. Oh Alec please don't tell him what happened to me!

"Did you freaking rape her last night? Oh by the Angel Jace tell me you didn't!" Alec said furious and worried. Jace sounded even more furious than Alec, "Don't you know me at all? My god! It's like you don't even know me, do you even trust me anymore?Never not ever would I do that," I could tell that Alec was surprised by his outburst for he didn't respond for a few seconds.

"How do I know you didn't do that?" Alec said softly, "how do I know that I can trust you?" "you want to know why I wouldn't do that, it's because I freaking god damn love her!" Jace shouted.

Before I knew it my eyes were open and I asked, "you love me?" Alec and Jace turned to me equally surprised but I didn't care. "Of-of course I love you Clary. How could I not I-I mean uh," I shut him up with a kiss.

But this time no memories taunted me. All I felt was Jace and I. Jace and I were the only things that mattered, the only things that existed. Until Alec cleared his throat.

"Clary, are uh are you okay?" Alec asked uncomfortably. I sighed against Jaces lips, "yes Alec, as you can obviously see I'm okay." Alec started walking towards the door, "right um I will be heading out then, I guess, uh bye?"

Jace returned to kissing me while I laughed. "What's so funny?" "The way Alec looked, he was so uncomfortable!" Jace started to chuckle "you think he's never seen a guy kissing his girlfriend before!"

I paused. Girlfriend, I was Jaces girlfriend. Jace is my boyfriend. Jace is my boyfriend!

I got out of bed and headed towards the door. "Where are you going?" he asked me alarmed.

"Just going to put on something more...appropriate," I told him seductively. Then I winked for good measure. I walked out the door swaying my hips and closed the door before laughing quietly.

I ran to my room to put on my training gear.


	27. Chapter 27

I put on my training gear, put my hair in a stylish bun, and slipped my cell phone in my pocket. I skipped out of the bathroom and the no-door room. I stopped in front of Jaces door, took a deep breath, and almost walked in when Iz came out of her room.

She raised an eyebrow at me in question. I decided to explain the while situation to her, "last night I slept-and only slept-in Jaces room. This morning he kissed me so I told him I would 'put on something more appropriate to wear'" I could see was trying to stifle a laughter.

"Wait right here or else I will burn all of your clothes," Iz threatened me. The thing is I knew she would do it. Not that it mattered, in five minutes she wouldn't be able to stand the thought of me having no clothes and take me shopping. For. Five. Hours.

Not my idea of a fun afternoon. A minute later Iz emerged from her room wearing a ponytail and training gear. "Let's go," she whispered to me exited!

I barged right into Jaces room where he was lying on the bed in underwear. There were candles around the room and music playing. I heard Iz snort, trying to hold in the laughter but failing.

"Iz," Jace said with a nervous laugh, "what are you doing here?" I replied instead of Iz, "oh I invited her to train with us, that is what we are doing," I paused, "right?" I put on a look of innocence that could not be ignored.

"Oh of course, how silly of me" he said putting emphasis on the silly. "I would love to stay, but Simon is waiting downstairs and I still have to get ready." Iz broke in before flouncing out the door.

I watched Iz leave the room, hoping she would turn around and come back, claiming that she was joking. But she didn't. The room started getting dimmer and dimmer and dimmer until I was finally plunged into darkness.

All of a sudden the music turned off. I couldn't see a thing and the only thing I heard was my breathing. I could tell Jace was coming towards me, but I acted dumb.

Then 'the attacker' pounced. He made sure I didn't hit the ground too hard, so obviously Jace. His fingers were jammed into my sides causing me to squeal and jerk.

He didn't stop, he was relentless. I ended up gasping "stop please just stop," before he finally stopped but held me down.

"Do you apologize?" he asked me in a singsong voice. I nodded my head. "Good," he replied pecking a kiss on my mouth.

"Do you promise to not do that again?" Jace asked again-still in the singsong voice. "Yes," I whispered against his lips were only a fraction of an inch away from mine. "Good" he said right before kissing me. I closed my eyes and savored it. The kiss was long, hard, and passionate.

"You know," I mumbled against his lips, "I wasn't kidding about training." I told him seriously. "Your right," Jace sighed "aren't I always?" I asked him.

I felt him pull away and turn the lights back on. I got up slowly wondering when Jace changed since he was now in a dark top and dark jeans. Dark looks good on him.

Jace led me to what I assumed was the training room but turned out to be the kitchen. I gave Jace a puzzled look so he explained the situation for me, "I heard that you haven't been eating much lately so I thought you might be hungry?"

"Well I'm not really that hungry but thanks anyway!" I replied truthfully. I usually eat enough to keep me going without starving myself. He put on the hopeful eyes and-with hope I his voice-said "I make a mean cheese sandwich?"

That might've looked like a statement, but it sounded like a question. Ugh, I can't hold this up anymore, not when he is looking at me with those golden eyes. Those melted golden eyes.

"I guess I could eat a bite or two," I compromised meekly. "Great sit on down and it will be done in a few minutes.

I wasn't starting to like my decision. He was putting paprika, 7 different cheeses, and something wit an orange tint. I think I might barf.

The sandwich is in front of me, ready to eat. I didn't want to hurt Jaces feelings, but I really didn't want to eat that. I quickly weighed my options. I grabbed the sandwich and took a small bite.

I perked up at the taste. It is scrumptious! I took a few more bites before I stopped, too full to take another bite. I set the sandwich down and looked at Jace.

"Didn't you like it?" he asked me. "Oh it was delicious, but I'm too full to take another bite," I told him truthfully. He looked at me, wonder in his eyes.

"Well we will have to change that, soon you will be like a little piggy!" Jace exclaimed while throwing me over his shoulder. I had a face full of Jace back, but I didn't care, I was so happy. So completely happy.

He was carrying me somewhere making pig snorts. It was so funny because he couldn't make them right. All of a sudden, in the middle of a laugh I fell on a mat.

I was so surprised I made a weird face without realizing it causing Jace to laugh. "Watch it Lightwood, I may be a little rusty but I can still kick your ass all the way to France," "ha I'd love to see you try!"

With that said I swept my foot the right way so that he fell on the ground. I immediately straddled Jace, and held his arms down with my own. "Don't doubt me Lightwood," I told him fiercely.

"Okay, okay" Jace said "I'm sorry!" "And your forgiven," I told him rewarding him with a long kiss. We were broken apart when Iz's voice broke through the silence, "ew ew ew! Can't you two like get a room, or you know actually train?"

"We are training," I told her, "we were trying to build up some tongue muscles." "I'm getting out of here before it becomes a threesome!" Iz said over her shoulder, practically running out the door.

I turned to Jace who was already upon me. "Good thing you got rid of her," he whispered in my ear. "We really should start training.." I trailed off. He sighed.

"What do you want to train?" he asked me. "Well," I said deciding to have some fun, "I was thinking I could practice my killing skills while you could practice your dying skills." I took out a sword and pointed it at him for good effect.

I could feel that he was scared, that he wasn't sure about me but was sure about me. He was like a pebble wobbling on a cliff, with one little gust if wind he could fall off. But if a gust of wind blew the other direction he would be safe.

His eyes held sadness, regret, and disbelief. I whipped out my phone and took a picture . "And post," I said to no one in particular.


	28. WARNING

I'm sorry but I won't be able to update for about a week. I will try to get a short chapter in here and there but school ends soon and I have too much school work/tests/projects. I also have soccer tryouts that are eating me alive. I hope you understand.

Thx

Rebecca


	29. Chapter 29

Boy did Jace look mad! Although his eyes had that playful glint in them, so I knew I was safe, I was still a little worried though. That is why I played it off by winking at him and walking off, trying to decide what to train.

My body isn't fully recuperated from the...incident, so I decided to start off light. Knife throwing, I decided, yes knife throwing is an easy start.

I grabbed some knifes off the shelf and moved to the counter where we were supposed to start. In under one minute I got bored and took a few steps back. Still too easy. I got annoyed by this.

With a huff I stormed to the other side of the room. My back was brushing the wall opposite of the targets. I glanced up to see Jace working on his balance somersaults-on the balance beam. I was glad he was working on something besides staring at me. Even though I don't show it, it makes me uncomfortable.

I threw the knife and it was harder but not hard enough to challenge me, if it's not complicated enough I leave. So I left. I helped Jace with his balance somersaults and when he left-because he was to tired-I continued to train until my legs gave out.

Jonathon, Valentine, Sebastian, all of them will find me and when they do I want to be prepared. With that thought in mind, I grabbed a dagger and concealed it within my clothes. When they come I will fight the bloodiest fight ever, I will fight until I can't fight anymore, and I will not back down. I didn't need to swear on the angel for this to be true.

I looked at the clock to see that it was almost 1 PM and I started and around 11 by myself. Not that great considering what I could do, 10 hours non-stop. Jonathan could do 34 hours. I need to keep training.

My reasonable side argued with me, your body is recuperating you need your rest. My body agreed with the reasonable side. Angel do I hate that side!

I dragged myself to the kitchen and sat there in a daze. I wasn't thinking anything, just sitting there. It was...nice, peaceful. That is until Iz came into the room jumping up and down. She grabbed my hand and half-dragged half-pulled me to her room.

She shoved me on the bed in a sisterly way, "what's up with you and Jace?" She asked, getting straight to the point. I just stared at her, uncomprehendingly until she asked me the question again.

"I don't know," I responded slowly still sort of deciphering the message. "Well," she said, her words rushing like a waterfall, "do you like him? Does he like you? What is up with last night? Why is Jace acting different?" I threw my hand over her mouth, her words still coming towards me.

Different? What do you mean different? I guess I said the words out loud because she started answering the question. "Well, Jace has always thought that he would never truly care about someone. And he cares about you, I can see it in the way he looks at you, that's pure love. I've never seen him look at someone like that, not even his parabati Alec."

I was stunned. Truly, positively stunned. Iz continued on, "the only girl he's ever cared about is me and now," Iz swallowed, "the first time he saw you was the first time I could be 100% sure about what he was feeling, Jace always hid his emotions. He doesn't want to burden us with his own burdens I guess. Well anyway, I guess I'm trying to say that Jace truly cares about you, loves you, your the only thing non-family related, so pl-please don't hurt him."

And then I fled. I don't know where I'm going, just letting my feet carry me. I ran until my feet wouldn't continue. I could still run, I was barely out of breath, my feet wouldn't run though. It was...weird.

I looked around. The familiar circle of dense trees surrounded me, I was in our spot. I looked around, detecting a few differences. Blood, probably mine, on the soft grass, and while the grass should be clear of anything at all, there was one thing. A flower, covered in blood.

I thought back to the night where I escaped the second time. Without realizing it, I was lying on the grass just like I did that horribly wonderful night, the very same flower in my hand. My back was on the ground and I was staring up, remembering the twinkling stars that night.

"Oh thank the Angel," A voice brought me back to reality, "we thought we lost you again!" I tipped my head up and back to see an upside-down Jace. "Why do you mean you thought you lost me?" I asked him uncomprehendingly.

"Well Alec and I were out...doing things," he paused, "and Iz sent us a text saying you were missing an the last time she saw you was when you ran out of her room like you met the demon Lilith!" by the time he was finished he was breathing heavily. He softy asked "what was the matter?"

I just shrugged in response. How could I answer a question like that? It would be too embarrassing. Jace saw that I didn't want to talk abou I am changed the subject.

"What's that in your hand?" Jace asked. "The flower I had on the night," I swallowed hard, "on the night you found me." He walked next to me and told me "I have a surprise for you. Come on home and you can see it."

Home? I don't even know where home is. But I didn't let any emotion show across my face except the smile of gratefulness when he offered his hand for me. I took hold of it and pulled myself up, dropping the flower in the process. I stepped out in front of Jace, walking towards the exit.

I pushed the moss aside and looked back to see Jace a few steps behind me. There was something I his pocket and I'm not sure, but I think the flower was gone.


	30. Chapter 30

I didn't question Jace about the flower, but instead ignored it. I would ask him about it later, I told the other part of my brain. But we both knew it wasn't true.

The walked to...wherever we are going was silently. He didn't say a word, I didn't say a word. Finally, Jace broke the silence by saying, "here we are," I was surprised to find myself in front of the Institute.

Before I could question Jace about it, he brushed in front of me and walked towards the Institute. I quickly followed Jace, not wanting to be left behind. Why are we doing at the Institute? He entered the Institute, with me on his heels.

In the front hall Alec was pacing back and forth nervously while Iz was checking her phone every second. When they heard the door close all of their attention turned on Jace, "did you find her?"

"I looked all over town," he said in depressed voice. "I hope she's okay," I heard Iz say in a tiny voice. I decided enough was enough-and to be a smartalec-so I said, "you know, just because I'm behind Jace and small doesn't give you the right to call me a she and her right in front of me!"

I stepped out from behind Jace, only to be bombarded by a Izzy and Alec. I had to take a step back to keep my balance and take small breaths of air to continue breathing. I swear they were squeezing the living daylights out of me!

Suddenly, Iz jerked her head out and glared at Jace. In response, Jace chuckled and asked "what did I do?" Iz turned back to me and said in an angry and fond tone "you told us you didn't find Clary."

He-fake-coughed and in a reasonable tone told Iz "I did not tell you I did not find her, I only told you that I looked all over town not that I didn't find her." Alec gave Jace 'The Look' which made him look away meekly.

I nearly laughed at the sight! Jace Lightwood looking away meekly from his own Parabati looking at him. That's a once in a lifetime. I was tired of the constant hugging so I turned to Jace as well as I could considering the people who I just wish would get off me!

"What was the surprise?" I asked him. "Oh right I nearly forgot!" he exclaimed, "follow me." And Jace sauntered up the stairs expecting me to follow him. I cleared my throat-an obvious gesture to tell Alec and Iz to get off. They pried themselves away from me, muttering apologies in the process and I sprinted after Jace.

It took me seconds to catch up to Jace all the while thinking what is the surprise? Jace led me to my room and gestured to the door saying "ta da." Seriously this is it?

This falls into the category of I'm Sorry not Surprise. I must have gave Jace a questioning look because he sighed. "Not the door," he explained, "behind the door."

I hesitantly opened the door only to be shocked at the sight. Behind the door was not my plain white-painted room with none of my possessions, but instead a bright green room with a puffy green comforter. And the pictures, and a bookcase, and a drawing easel.

And Sebastian, dead on the floor.

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